To say I fell for the bad boy was an understatement. No, it's better to phrase it as the all time goody two shoes fell for Sam. Yes, Sam. THE Sam. The one who got wasted every weekend and was undoubtedly the hottest guy in the entire high school. Yes, that Sam.
And then there was me, the girl who never broke the rules.
As I am the center of my universe, let's talk about me first.
I had just gotten the boyfriend of my dreams, or so I had thought. Tall, lanky and blonde, he was the nicest person I had ever met. Deep, kindhearted, and honest, he was the type of person I’d been looking for a long time. Our first date consisted of eating bagels on a fence and talking about what it took to make a good relationship. He said the people must connect, I said there had to be a spark, passion, and everything had to be natural, no forced movements or conversations.
I hadn't known Alistair for very long. We had art together. I was shy, he was shy, we sat next to each other almost a semester before we ever talked. It wasn't until a friend of his sat down at our table, and they began talking about mattress sliding off roofs before we became friends. Anything to do with roofs is my turf. I practically spent my entire middle school living on my roof. This was during the time my family life was chaotic, and the roof was the only quiet place I could unwind. Before that, my best friend and I wanted to go exploring, and found a way onto my garage roof. We proceeded to lift up tarps and ropes and soon we had set up a camp. My mom said we weren't allowed to sleep up there, so dreams crushed we took it down, but still explored every chance we got. So Alistair and I became friends. I felt safe with this guy so sweet he would never hurt me, and we talked for hours about emotions and ourselves, and our failed past relationships, or in my case lack of them.
We were sweet together. Our relationship went slow. A bit too slow. I felt intellectually bored, and frankly my first relationship lacked the passion I wanted to be able to experience with my first real boyfriend. He was a pure cyclist, and I a nature freak. We didn't have a lot in common. I craved passion, adventure. I wanted the real deal. Be careful what you wish for.
My wish merely started coming true in Connecticut, my favorite place in the world, mainly because I'm a sucker for natural countryside and ocean.
My grandparents live there, and as elderly people are on the slower side, it means tons of spare time to conquer some sit ups, swim a few miles, and try and earn that six pack I've almost gotten twice now. But the best thing in Connecticut, the most amazing thing there is, is the running.
My grandparents live on the edge of a forest, next to giant open fields of tall grass deer come to graze in. Now, this particular summer, I had been jogging the nice 2 mile stretch, and been happy with it. I'd come into the house breathing heavy, a stitch in my side and be jolly. But I have a competitive streak. Perhaps it originates from the drive for new experiences. But never the less, I wanted to try something harder. I wanted to try the three-mile loop. (Imagine dramatic music playing in the background) This was the choice that would lead to the best decision of my life.
I wanted to go at night. Night is my favorite time. It could be cause I was born at night, it could be because I am the oldest and that’s when my sisters go to bed and I can relax in peace, it could be because the exciting things happen at this time. Anyhow, I grabbed my flashlight, and shoes, and soon my shadow was jogging beside me in the dim moonlight.
I remember passing dark fields and imaging deer. I think of the feet thumping against the ground and my breathing rough as I work my legs to keep going despite the ache. I remember wanting to give up because I was tired, and being afraid because I was alone in the dark woods, and kept imagining snakes crawling onto the road from the side of my vision. I think I got scared by a deer, thinking it was a wolf, but its all a blur now. What I remember most is the most incredible pain I experienced, combined with an equal amount of fear that pushed to keep going, all being shut down because for the first time, I was able to shut out my thoughts. I stopped thinking and over analyzing, and became just breath and footsteps. I remember reaching the house, and not wanting to stop. I remember laughing at the four-mile mark, and experiencing triumph at the four and a half. The logical side of me told me to stop because I wasn't used to all this running, and who knew how sore I'd be tomorrow. Most clearly of all, I remember the feeling of complete and utter euphoria. I have never felt so happy in my entire life. It was the satisfaction of overcoming my limits, of shutting out my pain, of becoming fit and spending quality time with the night. Everything was perfect, everything clear and with a purpose and the world was a magical place. I promised myself I would join cross-country when school started up, which became the best decision I have ever made.
That's where I met Sam.