The next day, Anna runs up to me when I get to school.
"Hi," I say without looking up at her.
She sits beside me. "I've come to apologise."
"Being such a bitch lately. It's what happens when I'm really stressed and I'm really sorry."
Only then do I look at her, and there are tears streaming down her face.
"Did he dump you?" I ask.
She nods. "I wouldn't have sex with him so he dumped me because he didn't want to have to tell his friends that his girlfriend was frigid."
I turn to her and smile. "No offence, Anna, but you could have done with seeing the light sooner."
She grins back. "You're right, and I wish I'd seen a brighter one too. I should've left him there and then."
"Well, it's a good thing he dumped you then, isn't it? Perhaps you've got that to thank him for."
She looks at me like I've gone crazy. "Are you actually kidding me? He deserves to be drowned or burned at the stake or something!"
"So hide a voodoo doll in his house and claim he's a witch, then," I say as if this is the most obvious course of action.
And we look at each other and burst into hysterics. She feels like my friend again.