Today in our sister town of West West Wallingford, this correspondent witnessed amazing scenes, when the estranged husband of Mrs Genette Googiewithers (59) burst through the double doors of the Strattipole Hotel, which does duty as the local divorce court on the first Tuesday of alternate months (when not previously booked by conferencers).
Arnold Googiewithers (61) had not contested the divorce, which was on the grounds of desertion, and had not been seen in West West Wallingford, East Wallingford, Nor-Norwest Wallingford, or even Wallingford Magna, since the last Tiny Tim Tribute Concert, back in '86, when he was seen approaching the bar, having been dispatched there to buy his wife a Martini, so the place was in complete uproar.
John-Joe Rasperdapple (68) Mrs. Googiewithers' fiance, visibly paled at the sight of the returned spouse of his intended, and collapsed in a dead faint when the errant husband put his hands on his hips and shouted,
"Genette, did you want ice with that?"
Mrs Googiewithers is being treated for shock.
(a full report, with photos, will be in the WWW Gazette on Thursday)