“I don’t know… it just felt that way whenever I thought about her.”
“Well, what about the right side of your heart?”
“My friends held that.”
The doctor frowned.
“Because… I told my friends everything. All of my problems, worries, doubts… I shared it all with them. It felt like I left a part of myself with each one.”
“Then, considering the situation you’ve laid out in front of me, you should be fine at this moment. You should’ve been able to talk to your friends about this, and move on.”
Nathaniel nodded in agreement.
“That’s what I thought as well.”
“Then what kept that from happening?”
“I did the wrong thing…”
“The wrong thing?”
Nathaniel sighed, brushing the black hair from his eyes.
“I did talk to my friends about it, but I didn’t let them in… instead, I tried to find someone new to fill the empty space. I did find someone new, but it didn’t fix anything. I only continued to go down, trying to hold onto a ledge that wasn’t there.”
Nathaniel gazed into the blue shade along the walls, biting his lip at all the memories passing through his mind. The doctor let him stare for half a minute, then continued.
Nathaniel’s attention shifted back to the doctor, his face becoming relaxed again.
“Yes, go on.”
“What do you mean? I told you what happened, the rest is implied...”
“Perhaps, but you must pretend that you’re speaking to a complete stranger who wants to know every little detail. In addition, putting your memories into words is good for your mind. Things don’t seem as complicated then. Remember, you’re the one who needs help, not me.”
Nathaniel nodded, his green eyes studying the doctor.
“Alright, then… When I realized that what I was doing wasn’t working, I dumped the new girl, feeling guilty afterwards for leading her on.. By the time I realized what I should’ve done, it was too late. I felt completely hopeless all the time, and sometimes I didn’t even know why…”