so asically ma and some friends had a very interesting bus trip where we learn valuable lessons from drunk men, if you guys have ever had a weird bus journey, write about it, try and provethat its weirder than this one!!
"I really don't think that this is the right bus!" I said for the fifth time, the others just rolle their eyes Hatty, whos a bit of a know it all, said "I know what I am doing this is the right bus, I asked him and it wouldn't be if he hadn't taken our tickets! He even took in Milly and Amy's tickets!" We laughed, they had been given tickets to somewhere that was definetly not my home!
We all went back to what we were doing, eating the sweets that we all had gotten in WHSmith. Hatty was talking about doing something to add to her youtube account, I was camerwoman because I refused point blank to be on camera, where complete strangers can goggle at me.
Amy pulled her bag in as two men walked past us to sit across the isle from each other in the seats right behind us. "Do you happen to recognise any of this?" Milly asked me, looking out the window. I looked out and saw unfamiliar landscape, not good "nope!" "Great" she said sarcastically, we are very good at that, if there were a prize for the person who has turned sarcasm into their life I reckon that I would win that.
I leant forward to get something out of my bag and as I straightened up Milly shook her head at me, trying to control her laughter, I looked over to see Hatty also desperately trying to control herself, Amy however was off in the clouds and didn't notice anything. "What?" I hissed a Milly, still slightly leaning forward, she mouthed something back at me which I couldn't understand "what?" I whispered again. She leaned forward and whispered to me "the guys behind you has put his arm on your chair and if you lean back you would lan against his arm!" I sneaked a peek around and sure enough, the guy was leaning against my chair and had his arm drapped over it, "ugh why does everything happen to me?" I moaned.
For the rest of the journey I sat like that, it wasn't very comfortable, but that was nothing compared to what the men put Milly through.
I hve to admit, it was pretty obvious that these men were very drunk, their words were slow slurred and they were talking so loudly that the old lady at the very front of the bus had turned around to glare at them.
"Ha, yeah I completely agree wycome has turned crap since the war!" One of them said, "what war?" Milly mouthed at me, I shrugged, there had been a war in whycome? When was this? "Yeah but not as shit as London is! I tell you something though, if you are ever lonely and in London I have a number that you should call! This girl is outta this world, it was only £250, well cheap, she does it proper too, don't belong to em pimps she doesn't!" The other sounded interested, we were staring at each other trying not to gag, this was disgusting!
"I ain't never living in London, but thanks for the tip! Tell you if I ever won the lottery, you know what I would do? I would get a loada guns and dogs..." here Hatty cut in with her usual pointless tip "if you ran out of money how would you pay for the ammunition for the guns, or the food to feed the dogs?" Milly and I stared at her, Amy just chuckled luckily they hadn't heard her. "Yeah I would get a big house in the country with like a security system, as long as it wasn't in London!"
"What the hell is wrong with London?" I mouthed at Milly who shrugged and then did a huge mistake, I would just take a moment to advice anyone who ever travels on a bus that if there are drunk men talking behind you NEVER look at them! Unfortunately Milly couldn't help herself, and they noticed.
"You, the girl who's listening, never move to London, yuo'll immdiately gate raped, or mugged, could even be murdered, but I think that you will get raped!" Milly looked away the minuit she realised her mistake but that didn't stop them! "In fact all of you girls, never move to London, you'll all get raped, it isn't nice!" Yuk has he experienced it or something? "In fact everyone on this bus!" he yelled out "never move to London you will be raped!"
Luckily the bus stopped and it was time for everyone to get off, and as I had suspected it was the wrong stop!