Just as Alyson was mere yards away from his goal-the manly gold at the end of the Almighty(and manly) Double Rainbow-, he tripped and went tumbling to the ground. As he fell, a thought passed through Alyson's manly mind-how long was the road to the chemist? Before he had time to think, Alyson's manly face hit the not-quite-so manly ground and he slide towards the gold. And right into the not-quite-so manly tire of a not-quite-so abandoned(or manly) car.
"Hold it right there, punk!" a deep voice called from inside of the not-quite-so abandoned(or manly) car. Although Alyson was manly enough to kick the owner of the deep voice's ass, there was manly gold at stake. There was no time to lose.
Alyson jumped up and used her manly legs(and feet) to start sprinting the last few feet towards the manly pot. The manly man almost made it. Almost. Just as he dramatically(and manily) jumped into the air over the manly gold, a dark figure snatched it out from under him and Alyson face planted onto the not-quite-so manly ground for the second time that minute.
As the manly man got to his feet, his manly ears heard a car door slam and then tires screeching as the not-quite-so abandoned(or manly) car holding the manly gold sped away.
"This is bad," Alyson thought aloud,"this is very bad."