101 Illustrated Ways to Look like an Idiot




My yowl split the still night air with an ear-splitting pitch. Within seconds I was on my feet, running around and making inane noises as I went. I succeeded in running into several trees, colliding with plenty of low-lying plant life and even tripping over my own feet. I was in too much of a state to care.

Ohmygods I'm alive! I don't belive it, I'm alive! Properly, physically alive!


After about ten minutes of mindless hysteria, I collapsed on the grass, panting and making whimpering noises. I was alive. Having been dead for so long it felt unreal. Even the tickle of the grass beneath me was like a whole new experience. Elorie giggled and sat down beside me.

"Something tells me I should have said that a little more gently." she said, barely supressing a grin.

"Maybe." I replied, still feeling delerious.

Still laughing, Elorie helped pull me to my feet, squeezing my hand as she pulled me up. My hand tingled when she touched it.

No no no, get all those romantic soppy ideas out of your heads! It tingled because, for just over two years, I hadn't had anything touch me that didn't pass right through my non-existent body. Having something make contact with me again was an alien thing.
How depressing is that?

Once on my feet, I looked around the clearing.

And found Sarin, Jared and the other dark man staring at me with eyes like saucers. I turned to Elorie:

"Please tell me they didn't just see me freaking out like some moon-struck madman?" I said, my heart sinking in my chest.

"I'm afraid they did." she replied.

Oh dammit. Great work Nicor, your first ten moments of resurrection have been spent running around a clearing gibbering like a fool. Excellent method of introducing yourself.

I am such a brainless dolt.

With a groan of despair, I slapped my forehead, hard.


Too hard.


The End

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