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I can't tell you why my mom goes crazy. But, let me tell you, when she loses it, she loses it.
My names Autum....and my moms crazy...that's all you need to know about me.
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Nothing hurts more than a broken me, i know. more than a broken me i should know. Nothing hurts more than looking at yourself in the mirror, and not knowing who's is inside your body. It hurts when you don't even 
recognize your own eyes, and smile. 
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Chapter 1
"The maddness starts."

My mom never was always this crazy. She lost her mind when father left her. It was a warm, summer day in March, when i heard screaming. I got up from playing dolls, and walked barefoot
towards the destruction i would not know that ruled my life today. My mom was hugging my dad knees, bagging him to stay. My father was trying to pry her arms off him to leave. 
We weren't good enough for him. He never loved us.
Anyways, i ran to my mother, trying to get her attention, when she threw me againts the wall.
Her red eyes, with a flowing mascara around them, looked to me, then to my dad, "Is it Autum. Are you not with me, because of her?"
Dad looked at her, mad, "No."
My mom dropped her arms, and let my dad go. He left with a bang, and that day, my mother changed. I saw her eyes turn ice cold, and she turned to stone.
After he left, my mom stayed in her room, and left me alone. I had to fend for myself. I was only 10, and i was alone. 
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I had to be twice my age. I had to make my own breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I walked everywhere, i had to take calls for my mom, and i even had to lie for her. 
If the person who owned the apartment came knocking on our door, i knew the drill. I had to go to my moms room, get the money, and hand him the check. If he asked me where was my mom,
i told him that she was...A) Sick
B) In the bathroom
C) Working late

Honestly, D) was always the right answer. Mom always slept forever.....and she will be sleeping forever. 

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Mom died March 15, 2007, at 3:13 A.M.
The same date by dad left us.
I know this for a fact, because i was there. And, lets get it straight now, I didn't kill her. We where at home, and we got in an agrument. I was making dinner, when my mom
came home...drunk. It was 5:02 P.M, and mom was looking for trouble. I was 14 when my mom died, and i was more mature than her. Not just mentally, but all the other aspects i was older than
my mom. I looked like i was 16 people said. I had red hair, i was 5'5, and i had green eyes. 
Well, my mom came home, and slammed the front door. She prowled into the kitchen, and strided towards me.
She pulled my red ponytale, and slurrs, " ..doing?"
Mom was sorta strong, but not enough to hurt me. Than again, i try to be full of stone so no one can hurt me.
I pushed my mom against the table, "Making dinner, one of us had to cook."
She laughed, walked over to the table, and picked up her wedding glass. She looked at herself in the reflection of the glass, and through the glass to the floor, "Maybe if
your dad where here, he would cook."
"But he's not." I say to her.
Out of no where, i feel a sting against my left cheek, and it all tumbled in, she slapped me. I explode.
I got up, charged at my mom, and watched as she fell to the ground. I glared at her, as she is face down into the floor.
"How are you doing mommy? Good, well, ask how i'm doing?"
Silence, "No, no you won't. Well, i'm not good. I live with a mom who is like a brick wall, and i have no friends. I have no friends because of you."
I kicked her, "They all think i'm a freak, because of you. You, and how you don't care about me."
I snapped out of my trance, and freaked out. I crawled to mom, and checked her pulse. She's breathing, just passed out. I carried her up stairs, and put her to bed. I forgot that 
i had pizza in the ovan. When i got downstair, i cleaned off the table, and went to bed. 
The next thing i heard is my mom screaming, and i smelled smoke. I got up quickly from my bed, and ran to my moms room right next to my mom. She was on fire, and she
was buring down. I couldn't get to her. He whole room was on fire, and my room was started to be lit on fire too. I ran to my room, grabbed the phone, and called 911. I threw the phone, and dashed under my bed. 
I grabbed a picture of my dad, mom, and me...together. Thinking quickly, because my walls were on fire, i threw my chair at my window. The window broke, and i jumped to the grassy ground. I layed there, and passed out.
I woke up in a hospital, alone. It took me a few seconds to remember what happened. 
I never felt more alone, then there. 
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It was maybe an hour later when in walked my nurse...and a cop.
The nurse came in just to check, and left. The police stayed.
He come over to my bedside, "My names James."
"I'm Autum."
"Well, Autum, can you tell me what happened."
I stared at him, "What do you mean?"
James took off his hat, and set the hat on the desk over towards the window, "Your mom died.....from a fire."
The sound of his voice seems to implicate that he thinks i killed her.
"I was making dinner, when we got in a argument. She came home...drunk, and we got into it. Mom passed out on the floor, and i carried her up too bed. I forgot the i 
put in a pizza. I went to bed after putting mom to bed."
James i could tell wanted to know what else happened.
" I woke up to her sceaming, and i smelt smoke. I ran to her room, and i knew i couldn't save her. She was on fire, and so was her whole room. So, I ran to my room, got a picture of dad, mom, and me. I picked up
the chair, smashed the window. After i smashed the window, i jumped out of the window, and i blacked out."
I looked up at his brown eyes, and saw that he still wasn't statisfied.
James came over to me, and looked over to me, "Your dad's here. Your going to be living with him from now on. Listen, Autum, i'm very sorry for your loss."
And, with that he left, and my dad came in. 

I will never forget that day....never....

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Chapter 2
"Broken Fall."

It's been 3 years since my mom's death. My dad got a new family. He got Mariam...A.K.A my "mom". Along with my "mom", came Carson, Jacke, and Gracie.
Carson is one year older than me, Jack is two years younger than me, and Gracie is my age. My dad met Mariam a year after moms death, and he's happy. There okay, but i don't consider them
my syblings, because were all to different. Carson, Jack, and Gracie all grew up a go-lucky mom, and had no trouble. Carson is a football star, Jack is terrific at piano, and Gracie is a ballet star. 
Mariam tries to get close to me, but i pull away. I don't want to get close to her, or to anyone. I don't want to get close to anyone who can hurt me...never again. My dad, and i aren't so close. I have resentment boiling up in me, and he
has grief painted on him.
It's September 2nd, 2008.
It's my first day of highschool. I'm a freshmen, and i'm broken.

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People complain about how there's So much drama in school. My cure, is not to get involved with people. They will only set you up to be dispointed. Trust me,
I know from experience. 
My first class is American Studies, and i sit in the back. I sit in the desk next to this smelly guy, who's name must be Gunther. Gunther sits to my left, this other guy
who smells better then Gunther, sits to my left. I don't know his name though. He never speaks. This girl with blonde hair, Everlyn, sits in front of me. 
American Studies is funny. We have question of the day. 
The question: What do you lool forward to this year?"

I wrote: Getting through the year

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My second class Extended Algebra. I'm extemley bad at math, i don't get the subject at all. 
My teachers name is Mr. Davis. He has black hair, skinny body, and wears black glasses. So typical.
He's a funny teacher, he's always making up funny stories to help us with algebra.
I slept through his class, and woke up with the bell.
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My third class is gym. I don't really like gym. Yes, i'm a fast runner, but i'm not into running if i have to. I run, because i feel like it.
There are 13 people in our gym class. The only person i know in the gym class is Gracie. She bothers me. She stands by her friends in her short shorts, and twirls her 
pony tail. She looks around, and smiles. She's like, yes, all eyes are on me. 
Our class plays soccor. I was on the blue team, and i was blocking people from trying to get the ball. I do get agressive with sports, so i did end up pushing people.
For example, Gracie thinking she's all that, has the ball. She looks at me, and smirks. That's all it took for me to break. I ran to her, and kicked the ball from her. Well,
when i kicked the ball from her, and to my team mate, she fell on her butt. Serves her right, she needs to be broughten down a level. My team mate got the ball, and we won.
Gracie did not like that at all. She knocked into me in the changing room on her way out.
I looked at her in the mirror, and she knew. She knew that this year will not go as she planned.
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The End

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