Our small armyMature

I really wanted to hear what happened with Em, but I was also nervous about Caleb and Colton. I peeked out the window as they all piled out of the camper. The boys looked sleepy, and so did Tyler and David. I looked back at Em as they headed for the front door, she looked upset yet confused.

I held the door open and all four boys walked in, Tyler stopped and kissed my belly, then my cheek. Em leads him into the baby’s room so Tyler could tuck the twins into bed. David headed into the living room and lay down on the couch.

I hovered into the doorway, and I watched Tyler as he kissed the boys good night. He looked up to notice me waiting hesitantly, and he waived me over.

“Boys you remember Jessica,” he asks.

They both nodded their head, and Colton says,” Mommy says she is Bitch what does that mean daddy?”

“Son, that is not a polite word and I don’t want to hear you say it again OK?” Tyler tells him tenderly. “Emily and Jessica are letting us stay here while the house is built, let’s be on our best behavior OK?”

They both nodded again, and this time Caleb spoke,” When is mommy coming?”

Tyler kissed his forehead once more,” We will talk when you wake up.”

He turned on the Cars night light and closed the door halfway. Even though they were young boys, the comment hurt my feeling a bit. I knew it was partially because my emotions were on the fritz because of the pregnancy. I also knew Tyler needed me more than ever, and there was no room for selfishness.

We climbed into my bed, and I lay my head on Tyler’s chest, “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you to pumpkin,” he said kissing my forehead.

“What did you tell them, about their mother,” I ask him.

“I didn’t really tell them anything yet, they just know they are staying with me for a while,” Tyler tells me. “I was hoping you could help me decide how to approach the subject.”

“Sure,” I said as I nestle my body as close as I could to his.

Then we both drifted off to sleep, and I into a dream.

“Jessica, you stole everything from me,” Helen’s angry voice rang in my ear. I was at Tyler’s house, only it wasn’t burned down, and I was surrounded by people in black attire.

“Why do you say such things,” I ask in a stern tone.

“It’s because of you he is gone,” She sobbed. “You just had to go and make him love you, and then break his heart. So he couldn’t live without you, and he took his own life.”

I walked into the living room and there was a casket twenty feet ahead of me, but I was afraid to look. Helen pushed me forward.

“Go look, just look what you did,” she cried.

I reached the casket and peered down at Tyler’s pale face and began to cry hysterically.


“Pumpkin, wake up your dreaming,” Tyler’s voice woke me.

I threw my arm around him tightly and started to cry. He pulled me off and asked me what happened. I told him about my dream, and he hugged me tight.

“Baby I’m not going anywhere, I promise,” He says.

I could tell it was late afternoon by the scorching rays of sun blinding the blinds.

“Where is everyone?” I asked him remembering the boys.

“Em took the boys to the park an hour ago, and David left right after we went to sleep,” Tyler tells me.

I could tell he had been up for a while, he was showered and dressed.

“Em made lunch for the boys and she saved you a plate, you must be starving,” Tyler coaxed me out of bed.

I ate and then got into the shower, I felt revived after that long night we had. I heard the shower door open behind me, and it startled me. It was Tyler, and I was shy now that I was showing.

“I’m so fat, don’t look at me,” I said trying to conceal myself.

“You are beautiful Jessica,” he said in a convincing voice.

 I was glad he was home; we finished our shower and dressed. When we came back down stairs Em and the boys were just getting home.

Em still had that look on her face, and I knew she wanted to talk.

“Tyler, Em and I are going to go get some food for the house,” I tell him.

Em catches on and grabs the car keys, and I follow her to the car. I wait until we pull off our street to ask.

“What happened?” I asked.

“He kissed me,” she blurted out.

“What? Like he kissed you,” I clarified.

“Just a peck on the lips,” she cleared up.

“Well how did it make you feel?” I ask her.

She doesn’t answer my question, she only tells me about his plan to win her heart. She tells me David left this morning because he had a case in court today. So she hadn’t actually faced him since, but he was coming for dinner tonight.

“What are you going to do?” I probe her.

“I don’t know geez Jess, can you not be so pushy right now,” Em snaps at me.

Tears streamed down my face before I even realized I was crying. Em had never snapped at me like that before, and it hurt. I knew she was under a lot of pressure, and I tried to brush it off.

“I’m sorry Jess, I’m just so damn confused,” She said hugging me as we got out of the car at the super market.

“I’m sorry to Em, I will drop it until you’re ready to talk more,” I smiled grabbing a cart from the cart return.

Now that we were going to have a small army in the house, we needed to buy bulk. So we started in isle one.

“The boys keep asking about their mother,” Em tells me.

“I know Tyler hasn’t told then she’s gone yet, he doesn’t know how. He wants me to be there when he tells them, he wants my opinion on how to approach it,” I tell her as I grab a jar of pickles.

“I’m sure you two will think of something together,” Em says.

“Well he had decided to hire a store manager, so he can be with the boys. He is putting out a job posting and setting up interviews this week,” I inform her.

“I think we should get the twins some color books and crayons, “ Em says to me as we pass the toy section.

I stop in the middle of the isle and stare at her,” I’m scared I’m going to mess this up with Tyler.”

“Jess this is new for both of you, and together you will find a way to pull through,” Em comforts me.

Two full shopping carts later we head to the register, and pay for our items. The car ride home was silent, beside the music playing at a low volume on the radio.

When we pulled into the drive David’s car was already here, and I looked at Em.

“I will call the guys to help,” I said as I exited the car.

I felt bad for Em, I wasn’t sure what her decision was about telling David. She was my sister, and I would stand behind whatever decision she made. I was hoping tomorrow after work Tyler and I could take the boys to the park, so we could all talk. I don’t know anything about them; I didn’t even know they were six until last night.

I set the bag on the table and began putting the food away as the boys carried it in.



The End

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