Tainted Saint, Chapter Forty-SixMature

"What are we doing here, Morris?" Cassandra whispered, once she and Morris had gone a little ways from everyone else.

"I keep asking myself that."

Cassandra looked down at the street. Though the bustle of Nicu continued on around her and Morris, she was focused on one thing, and only one thing. What are we doing here?

"I came back because..." Morris' voice trailed off, and he looked away. "I just can't seem to stay away," he finished lamely.

"The King has invited both of us to stay at his castle, to be a part of his people," Cassandra said softly. "So why are we here and not there, Morris? Why are we still here?"

"We weren't meant for upright lifestyles."

Frustrated at how poignant Morris' words were, Cassandra threw her hands up in the air. "Well, apparently the King thinks so, and he has got to know better than both of us! Morris, why are we forgoing such a beautiful opportunity to be something different?"

"Cassandra, do you really want to be something different? You always go for what you want. If you really wanted to be with the King, you'd have up and left by now."

Morris' assessment of the situation was accurate, much to Cassandra's chagrin. "Well, when you say it that way, you make me sound positively conceited," she muttered.

"I'm only telling the truth."

A little ways away, a man's donkey clearly wasn't traveling as quickly as its owner desired. The man began yelling and beating the poor creature. Cassandra grimaced and looked away, but when she averted her eyes, she spotted a "woman for hire" flirting with a customer. Feeling trapped, Cassandra closed her eyes.

What am I doing here?

"I want to go back and live at the castle," Morris continued. "I really, really do. But for some reason, I want this more. I want to come back to the life I used to know."

"There's no honor in it," Cassandra spoke emptily. "No honor in a life such as this."

"So why do we insist upon running back to it?"

Sighing shakily, Cassandra met Morris' beautiful but sorrow-ridden eyes. "Because when it all boils down to it, Morris, humans don't want honor. Sure, it's a nice thing to have, but only if it comes along freely with what we want."

"And what do we want?"

Speaking for herself, Cassandra clasped her hands together nervously and spoke with shame. "I just want to be gratified. But I'm looking for gratification in all the wrong places, because it's in my nature to be repelled by the very thing my soul searches for."

"And what does your soul search for?" Morris asked, but it was clear he already knew the answer.


The End

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