Sugar Daddy

Mary is recently divorced and trying to make ends meet. Sue is single and a carefree spirit who believes love is worth a million bucks. Together they play the field of rich bachelors and find what they need, not necessarily what they're looking for.

“Hand over my keys,” I said to Mary. I did not raise my voice. I did not smile. But with my tone I very much meant business.

            “What for,” Mary responded.

            “I was driving behind you. I saw you cut off that pickup.”

            “Sue, what are you talking about? I didn’t cut off anyone. Do you mean that guy who wouldn’t let me merge?”

            “What I mean is I saw the pickup ahead of you in the left lane, and I saw you in my SUV in the right lane speed up and push the pickup off  into the median. You nearly caused an accident.”

            “My lane was ending due to construction. He wouldn’t let me in.”

            “Mary, all you had to do was let off the gas and you could have easily slipped into the left lane. You didn’t have to speed up and nearly cause an accident just to get ahead because you were in a hurry. In fact I even saw the gas flap open.”

            Mary softened her voice and then put on her best ‘contrite’ show. “Oh, I meant to close that when I filled up. I had to rush in and pay. I forgot, I’m sorry. I won’t let it happen again.”

            “I know you won’t let it happen again because I’m taking the car back.” I held out my hand for the keys, but prepping for the storm. As I suspected, Mary’s contrite manner dissolved into her usual pent up fury.

            “Fine! Take your damn Honda!” She threw the keys at me. I ducked and they hit the wall behind me. “I hate shelling out half my money on gas just so I can get across town for work anyway. I guess I’ll have to take the bus and spend three hours a day just getting to and from work.

            Mary’s transportation problems were not my problems. It wasn’t my fault she let her car get repossessed. But as a good friend I allowed her to borrow my Range Rover for a while until she got back on her feet. I lent it to her with the understanding that she would take care of it, not play Speed Racer with it.

            “I’m sorry, Mary,” I said, picking up the keys and dropping them in my purse. “I know you’re having problems but you know it’s not even my car any more. Peter will want it back after he settles in Chicago. The slightest ding on that car and he’ll kill me.”

            Mary sighed and slumped onto her kitchen table. “If only Rick were still around. He’d drive me anywhere.”

            I raised an eyebrow. “Don’t even think about going back to Rick. He slept with so many other women you’d be riding in a carpool.”

            She looked up at me, eyes wide open. I’ve seen that look before. It’s the look she gets when she has some cockamamie idea. “Ok then, it’s time I find another sugar daddy. In fact, I think it’s time we both found a sugar daddy. Peter left you with an overpriced condo payment and no alimony. You deserve a man who appreciates you and is willing to share the wealth. So let’s get dolled up and get going! Ooo! I’ll even let you wear my little black dress tonight!”

            Oh, boy. Here we go again. I knew I was going to give in and go out with Mary. What I didn’t know was how it would change my life.

The End

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