I couldn't stand to be in this town any more. It was just another bad memory to me now.
Thoughts of Sarah flooded my mind, but I couldn't afford to let them cause me sadness. Going back over our entire friendship in my head was difficult, because it made me so emotional, but I wasn't sad.
I could only feel anger and hate for this town and everybody in it. Once again I had been cheated. Just as I had felt that I could be safe in one place. I guess nowhere's home for the homeless. I felt tears slide gracefully down my cheeks as I thought over all the support Sarah had given me. All the advice, the friendly care, the shoulder to cry on. But it had all been a masquerade. She had been lying this whole time. Pretending to be my friend to get my history out of me. This made me dry my tears. I couldn't be sad. Anger and hatred radiated through me.
Every ounce of energy I had went into hating this place and the things that it had done to me.
I couldn't stand to be here any longer. I had to leave.
I was still sat on the bench an hour later, thinking over things that were far beyond my maturity level. How could all these things happen?! I was so wrong. I was disgusted with myself - disgusted that I let my guard down. Disgusted that I had become vulnerable.
Looking down at my feet the same way Sarah had done only an hour ago, I frowned as I noticed something in the grass. It was a small piece of paper. What appeared to be a ten pound note.
It was in the same spot that Sarah had dropped her pad, and so it must have been hers.
Smiling to myself, I realised that she at least owed me this. I picked up the money, and thinking things through quickly, headed to the train station.
The cheapest ticket was only fourteen miles away, and it was the town that my parents lived in, so that was out. The second cheapest had me with only £1.20 change, but it was worth it just to get further away from the places that had hurt me.
Taking the ticket, I headed over to the platform and waited. The train eventually arrived, and I was the first to board. Getting myself a window seat, I looked out upon the town that I was leaving behind.
Again, the thoughts resurfaced. I thought of mum and dad, and their faces, and imagined what they might be doing now. Were they still together? Had they made up since I left? Were they still looking for me? ...Had they ever looked for me?
Then I thought of Sarah. Had she really had the best intentions at heart? Had she really liked me, as a friend or as anything more? Would she have continues to help me even after her project? ...Or would she just have forgotten about me, like everybody else does?
I tried to push those thoughts to the back of my mind once more.
All the hurt was to be left here. I was starting again.