(To the tune of ''Another Suitcase In Another Hall'' from Evita)

 

I don't expect these chocolate bars to last for long.

Never fool myself that willpower sees me through.

Being used to salads and fresh fruit, I ate them -

But all the same I hate them

Wouldn't you?

So what happens now?

(Another diet and another fast)

So what happens now?

(Take yourself off to that slimming class)

Where am I going to?

(You'll lose weight,  you always have before)

Where am I going to?

Time and time again I've said I'll exercise,

That I will join a gym;

That I'll run, every day.

But every time, I'm lazy -

All my thoughts of jogging,

And general hard slogging -

Fade away

 

So what happens now?

(Another diet and another fast)

So what happens now?

(Take yourself off to that slimming class)

Where am I going to?

(You'll lose weight , you always have before)

Where am I going to?

Call in three months time and I'll be slim, I know -

Well, maybe not that slim,

But size 12, anyhow.

I won't recall the names and details of the plans and diets,

But I just had to try it

Anyhow.

 

So what happens now?

(Another diet and another fast)

So what happens now?

(Take yourself off to that slimming class)

Where am I going to?

(You'll lose weight, you always have before)

Where am I going to?

(Don't lose anymore)

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You look at the clock on the stove, which reads 6:45am, just as your son utters the words you thought would wait AT least until lunchtime....

excerpt from who's idea was school holidays?   by theChickSarcastic