Some kids still swallowing soda can safety tabs

Michelle came home to find her son sitting in front of the television with a 24-pack of Coca-Cola Classic at his side.

Finding this slightly out of the ordinary, Michelle walked up to Michael to find out just why he thought he needed a full case of Coke beside himas he atched his television shows. Soda pop after all was something netiehr Michell nor her husband Mark promoted the use of to their children.

As she walked the ten feet from the door of the living room to the television in the living room, she noticed that of the 24 cans, nearly all of them had been opened. How, she thought to herself quickly, could a child drink that much pop in such a short time. She had only been gone thirty minutes.

"Michael, why are you drinking so much cola? You know you're not supposed to be drinking cola," she said sternly.

"I know mom, that's why I'm not drinking it, just look at the floor," he answered matter-of-factly.

She turned her attention back to the carpet and looked carefully. Sure enough, when she looked hard at the brown carpet in front of the televesion, she saw larger brown spots in 24 different places. and the spots looked wet.

"I don't get it. Why are you going through all these cans of cola if you don't even want to drink them?"

"It's strictly for the soda can safety tabs mom, these things taste like metal."

Michelle looked at her son, then looked at the cans, the looked at the lids on the canse, and then didn't look at her son, then looked at the spills, then did look at her son, then looked at the blood trickling from the corners of his mouth, then didn't look at him again.

"That's becasue theyr are metal. And sharp," she said finally.

"Yeah they are, look at my mouth," he said, opening up his mouth wide enough to have several of the safety tabs trickle out.

"Are you swallowing them too?" she asked, noting there were fewer safety tabs in his mouth than there were cans on the ground.

"Only after I've chewed them."

"So you open the soda can our out the soda, take off the safety tab, put it in your mouth, chew on it until your muth bleeds, then swallow the jagged metal bits?"

"Normally my throat bleeds a bit too," Michael answered.

"Why?"

"Because the metal is so sharp."

"No, not why does your throat bleed, that I can figure out. Why do you swallow them?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe because that's what kids do."

Michelle didn't know what to say or do. she looked around at the mess of blood and soda pop one more time.

"Why do you need to pour out the soda pop on to the carpet before you take the safety tab off?"

"It's too dangerous. I could cut myself on the soda can lip if I didn't do that."

"Eff off. It's too dangerous?"

"You sound like a really bad parent right now mom, why are you swearing at me because I don't want to cut my lips on sharp metal."

"It could be because you're doing it to make cutting your lips on metal more safe. that makes no goddam sense to me."

"Don't take the lord's name in vain please. It's not Christian."

"But what's worse is that you're ruining the carpets. How in the hell am I going to get that out?"

"Shamwow."

The End

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