Crying

Unconsciousness can't keep it's promises.

I tossed in my sleep, nightmares filling every inch of my body. This was unusual for me; I barely ever have nightmares.

I dreamt that me and Nessie were cuddled up on the sofa when four newborns burst through the door. In anger, I had transformed into a wolf. Nessie stood in the corner, eyes wide in fear. I galloped infront to protect her, but one got me. Eyes a livid red, nose in a perfect, straight angle, brunette, layered hair falling to her shoulder blades. She leapt at me, tearing a chunk of my neck off with her teeth. I felt the sharpness of them sink into my neck as the venom intoxicated me. I writhed in pain, Nessie's horrified expression playing over in my head, a video stuck on replay. I crawled limply towards her, hoping to somehow have the strength to save her. The other three jumped on top of her. I could almost hear the tears trickling down her face. I saw the crazed, bloodthirsty look in the vampires' faces as they sucked the life from her. I roared and growled as much as I could but I could feel my life slipping away; I tried to hold onto it in an attempt to preserve Renesmee's life but it was unbeatable..

I woke up then, gasping for breath, sweat dewing on my forehead. I cursed violently under my breath as I flicked a tear away. That did it. The moisture in my eyes bubbled up then poured over my eyelids as the waterfalls streamed silently down my face. I fumbled for the doorhandle and flicked the light on when I went into the kitchen. I stared blankly at the digital clock on the counter, not really absorbing the information it was blatantly giving me. It took me a while to actually realise what the time was. 1.ooam.

Nessie had said it was two pm when I went to sleep. I quickly did the math. I had been asleep for 12 hours. I quickly ran myself a drink of water. I knew I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep again, so I wondered what I should do.

I know. I'll go see what Edward and Bella were doing.

I tiptoed lightly up the stairs.

"Bella?" I whispered pointlessly. She would have heard me wake up and come upstairs anyway, no matter how quiet I was.

"What?" She asked. She sounded annoyed, but I swung the door open anyway. Her and Edward had a black leather bag with a few sheets of paper spread out on the floor where they were both sitting.

"What's that?" I nodded to things in between them.

"Oh, that's..that's nothing." She never had been a good liar.

"He knows." Edward told Bella.

"Oh. Why?"

"I had to. Why isn't he allowed to know?"

"I don't know, I just thought it was a secret, that's all."

"So, what is it?" I repeated.

"A few things in case this..ends badly." Bella murmured. I walked towards it and picked them up. The little leather bag looked like it belonged to Alice. On the paper, there were fake passports for 'Jacob Wolfe' and 'Vanessa Wolfe'.

"What are these?" I muttered, chucking the passports at Bella.

"Oh.." She looked down at them. "These are fake passports for you and Nessie. I got them last time the Volturi came, in the clearing, remember? When Alice left. I thought that.. If we didn't survive, you two would have to go on. Me and Edward thought that they would maybe be useful this time, too."

"And why does it say Vanessa?"

"They're fake, Jacob. We don't want people getting suspicious." I nodded.

"Bella. We're going to get through this, you know we are." I said, and Edward agreed.

"The chances aren't good," She chimed under her breath. I scowled at her and she scowled back. I continued to sift through the paper. There was a letter from Bella and a letter from Edward.

"D'you mind?" I asked, unfolding one.

"Of course not," Edward and Bella replied at the same time. I read Bella's one first.

My sweetest Renesmee.

If you are reading this, I am gone. I am so sorry honey. I loved you more than anything in the world, and you know that. I know that things have ended for me, however that has happened, but you must know that things have not ended for you. My last request is that you carry on your life happily. I don't want to spoil your life for you, baby. I loved you so, so, so much, and I still do. Remember that, please. Stay safe and be happy.

Love for eternity,

Mummy.

The look in Bella's sorrowful eyes told me that she could have wrote pages upon pages of farewell to Renesmee. I folded it carefully and tucked it back inside the bag. I started on Edward's.

Sweet daughter.

Renesmee. I love you. Me and Mummy will always be with you. I know now that you are reading this, we are not with you physically, but always, always, with you in the place that it matters. The heart. I am so very sorry to have done such a cruel, painful thing to you by leaving you without a Father, but there are always many other people in this world who you belong with, and they will protect you no matter what. Please stay safe and don't let anything get you down, I couldn't bare to think that you would have the same unfair destiny as me. I am so very sorry.

I love you forever,

Daddy.

"Thanks," I choked out, and folded the letter back up, slipping it into the bag. "Can I write one?"

"Of course, Jake you don't need to ask. Here." She threw two sheets of paper and a pen at me.

"Thanks Bells."

"You're welcome."

I took the paper and went to sit downstairs at the kitchen table.

Renesmee.

I love you. No words can describe how much I truly do. I paused, wondering if it sounded too corny. I carried on anyway. I'm not with you now, I know. I'm sorry. I know I promised to look after you, protect you.. I remember promising to never hurt you. And no matter how hard I try to keep that promise, it keeps backfiring. I think that this happening may hurt you, and I am honestly so, so sorry. This reminded me of when I had first joined the pack. About the promise I made to Bella. They were exactly the same. A tear welled up in my eye and spilled over. I wiped it from my cheek with my wrist and continued writing. I will keep that promise, I have kept that promise. We are still together, Nessie. Emotionally tied within the heart. I still love you, but please, please don't let that stop you living a life. I want you to be happy, that's one of the only things I ask. I honestly don't mind if you have or get a new boyfriend. That is OK with me, I am extremely happy as long as you are. I smiled as I decided to add a famous Bella quote on there. Please don't do anything reckless.

I love you forever and ever, don't forget that sweetie.

Jacob.

I hurried back upstairs and slid the piece of paper into the bag, still laying across the bed, where I had left it.

"You okay?" Bella's voice danced in the cool air as she spotted an unwiped tear that was slipping freely down my face. Dammit. I rubbed it away and nodded. She smiled sympathetically. 

"Love you, Jake." She whispered.

"Love you Bells."

The End

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