Am I Mad?Mature

“SIRIUS!” He called out. 

A yowling sound could be heard from beyond the treeline.

Silas followed the sound and hiked. “SIRIUS!” 

He paused… another howl.

Following the sounds, he stumbled upon a small clearing. And there he stood.

The adolescent wolf stood proudly over a dead rabbit. Silas picked it up and pet Sirius and the happy wolf followed after Silas as they returned home together.

“Good boy Sirius. I am proud of you.” He hugged his friend and began to skin the poor little rabbit. He always apologized to every animal he ever killed. And now he had to apologize for two. But two is a number that is much more comfortable than one. And Silas finally did not feel alone.

Sirius was finally with family. Silas was finally with a companion.

They loved one another.

They quietly shared the rabbit. Sirius would sometimes wander off to fetch more food, but every night, the pup returned home and slept in the hut with Silas, sometimes on the floor, and on very cold nights, up on the bed. 

Not to keep Sirius warm, his coat was thick and the wolf was actually very happy in the snow. But instead, to keep Silas from getting cold, and Silas appreciated it so.

He still spent nights laying under the stars. Except now, Sirius joined him and gazed up with him.

Silas introduced him to all his friends. The homeless man from St Paul, the Bride in Oregon, the people from the phone book, his mother, the kids from the asylum, the nurses, and he introduced her last to Anne. 

“Sirius, that star used to have your name. But since you’re here, the name had to go somewhere. Now it’s yours. That is Anne, my love. Well….used to be.” 

Sirius was quiet, instead of yowling or yipping, he laid his head down on Silas’s stomach and closed his eyes. He reached down and scratched his friend behind the ear and saw what he swore was a smile.

“You’re a good friend, Sirius… I love you.” 

Sirius made a small sound, one that’s not easily described. Like a whispered howl. 

“I love you too, Silas.” He imagined a voice for Sirius. 

Was it mad, to give his wolf-friend a voice? Of course, it was, and Silas knew damn well that it was. But it also gave him someone to talk to. 

“Sirius, Do you forgive me for taking your mother from you?”

“I miss my mother. I loved her very much… But she would want me to be happy. And you take care of me. Am I sore, about you taking her from me? Sometimes I am. But I know, that you do love me very much, you protected me from that bear, remember? You give me food. Teach me to hunt. My mother and I were abandoned by our pack. We had no home. My mother would have died to give me a home. I guess she did so in the end…”

All of that, Silas translated from a light whimper. 

And he shed a tear. “I am sorry…”

“I forgive you, Silas. I do. You are my friend. I love you.” 

He reached down and held Sirius close, and the young wolf nuzzled his head against Silas’s. 

“Do you miss your Anne?” 

Silas nodded, “Yes…I do. But she, like you, is in a new home. She may be gone, but I am happy for her. Last I saw, she was with a man. And she seemed happy with that man. And I hope she has beautiful children, and a wonderful home. And I hope her husband is a big artist. Opening galleries in Paris.”

He sniffed a bit.

“Are you crying?”

“No…Just….Well… A bit, but it’s a happy kind of cry. I miss her. But I think of her living a happy life. And it makes me happy… and sad too.”

Sirius nudged Silas’s side. Gesturing him to his hut. 

“Tired are we?” Silas smiled.

He knew Sirius just wanted him to go lie down and be happier in bed, away from the light of Anne’s Star. 

Or so he thought Sirius would want.

“Am I mad?” Silas asked as he rested his head on a pillow made of furs and his old clothes. 

Sirius laid down across his belly. “Very.”  

He mustered a laugh before whispering before sleep.
“Sleep little angel.”

The End

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