Then the warthog said 'WAAUGH!!' and ran into the forest of mushrooms and papooses and platypuses.

Then the warthog said 'WAAUGH!!' and ran into the forest of mushrooms and papooses and platypuses

A passing platypus, whose name was Aloysius - but had never managed to tell anyone this, due to his inability to properly pronounce the name on account of his duckbill - said,  'What do you  mean, waaugh?'

Unfortunately, again due to his duckbill, Aloysius could not say this particularly clearly either, and all the warthog heard was, 'Aaaarp.  Aaaarp,' which, unfortunately,  is warthogese for 'Please put me out of my misery as I'm just a worthless monotreme, and don't deserve to live, but I wouldn't mind a mushroom risotto before you despatch me.'

The warthog, having been apprenticed for three years to Gordon Ramsay, was a dab hand at the old Wild Mushroom Risotto with truffle oil, was happy to oblige, once he had discovered a flagon of truffle oli secreted about the person of one of the papooses, though he had to forage in the forest a bit for a decent size pan.

He cooked, charged and skewered Aloysius, whose last words were 'aaaraaarp, arararp', which, brought a smile to the warthog's face.  He, among all present, knew that Aloysius had died in ecstasy.

 

 

The End

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