Selfish

I am so confused right now.

You said I was selfish. You said I took the entire relationship for myself. You said I was the only one who got anything out of us. And it's true. You gave me everything, and I was never satisfied.

But you also said I didn't do enough for me. You said I spread myself too thin. You said I wanted to have my cake and eat it too, and it got taken away from me before I could make up my mind which one I wanted.

So I take too much and I give too much. And now honestly I want to learn from this crash and burn experience but frankly I don't understand. And when I start shutting you off, its not because I don't like you, or care about you deeply, its because I have some things I need to sort through. And I didn't want you to shut down, and cast me off. Although you were wise to do so. I wanted to heal.


Now you have given me the time to heal, but another scar as well. Sure, I will over come it with time. I took your daggers and I didn't throw them back. But I hope you recognize even though I was spread thin, I still gave you things. And the less I had to give, the more it should mean to you, not what I didn't give you.

So now I start my journey to collect the shattered fragments of myself you left behind, and I am not listening to your judgments anymore. I am avoiding our mistakes.

The End

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