she keeps her wrist clean so nobody sees the pain. but she also doesn't want anyone to see how much she's hurting. only when the pain is too strong she takes a razor to her thighs to let the pain pass bye. she feels alone with no one to help her, all she wants is to talk about it with someone that can help her but she just can't bring herself to do it.. she knows she doesn't want to go down that road of hurting herself anymore, she doesn't want to let her family down but she just can't do this anymore. but what she doesn't realize is how stubborn she is and how she refuses to give up and she keeps going just to see how much more she can take. but theres the thing it always gets worse for her and she doesn't know what to do anymore, its like she's lost and has no direction or any idea where she is. because the pain is so bad there are two things she does one is smoking weed but she doesn't have the access right now and the other is self harm. but she doesn't want to do it anymore because she knows how its not helping her in any shape or form.