Chapter 2

Author's Note:

Hey guys, me again (obviously ;D)! So, thanks to any and all who have read, commented or messaged me about this story. Again, I don't mind critical comments, as long as they're not crude. I like it like that, hey! (Windows down, chillin' with the radio on...) 

Welp, anywho, thanks again for reading (in advance), and I appreciate any thoughts you'd like to share. Hope you enjoy it. Come at me, bro!

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Chapter 2

-The Art of Dying-

I was dead. And death had been painful, unrelenting, and horrifying. There was nothing gentle or peaceful about it. I had feared each passing moment until the very last when my heart ruptured in my chest, a near indescribable yet unforgettable pain.

There was no light around me. I was not drowning in a fiery lake, nor was I waltzing leisurely down golden streets, sipping on milk and honey. I didn't know where or when I was...I couldn't even be sure that I "was" at that particular moment. All I knew was that I had died and now I was present in darkness.

Was this place known as the ever famous Purgatory or Paradise where souls went to await there judgment? There were no other souls as far as I could see--though I knew not whether I had eyes for vision. There were no sounds or signs of light or life or existence, save for my thoughts and emotions. My logic was shotty, frenzied at best, yes...but if it were possible that I could have thoughts, it had to be possible that I still existed.

Time was nonexistent, in this place--wherever or whatever it was--that I remained. Only silence and darkness. I had no physical body, no eyes, no mouth. I didn't know what it was to breathe anymore. I had tried, in both purpose and in forgetting, to sigh at my pitiful fate, but without lungs, nothing more than a mental huff was even possible. There was no warmth, no coldness. No breeze or evidence of air whatsoever.

I let my mind wander, to the darkest depths of lunacy and even further beyond. There was nothing left to fret over, no society to fear nor peers to impress. I allowed myself to wallow in self-sorrow, get angry at any and everything, even be afraid of what was to come--and even worse so, that there was nothing yet to come.

I surmised that my presence here--decidedly the "After-death Realm"--was most-likely permanent, and as such, I should exist happily or at least mentally comfortable. I blocked away displeasing emotions and settled on picturing myself young, beautiful and healthy again, living a life of peace on a beach I had never seen save for a painting. A painting I could not place, but I favored and remembered it nonetheless. My form was not sickly and pathetically thin, I had regained my curves back from before my sickness plagued me. My hairless scalp now held the long, black curls I had so missed, flowing down around my waist. I held a new spark in my chocolate brown eyes, flickering with a false happiness that I so forcefully wanted to feel. I could almost taste the salt in the breeze, feel the water trickling past my toes, even feel my caramel complexion darkening in the warmth of the neverending sun. This was the life I wished I could have had. Peaceful, with no doctors, no setbacks, no wavering faith, and no painfully apologetic smiles from my family.

I had plummeted myself so deeply in this fantasy that I had almost forgotten the twinkle of sadness in my mother's amber eyes, and the utter mortification in my father's as news of my impending fate flowed quietly from my lips. I had stopped wondering if they had forgotten me, or forgiven the debts I had cursed them with. I had let go of the rage that my life had ended too early. I hadn't thought pitifully about the unsurmizable mark I had left on the world--or the one I would never have the chance to leave. My hopes and dreams, once as wild as black orchids and as big as the ocean, all now existed as gentle waves of nostalgia in the dazing ocean I resided.

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Ending Note:

So, thanks again for reading, and please, please, please don't be afraid to share your thoughts. 3oh3! Woohoo! Much love to all my homies (a.k.a. my crazy baby sister, Kenz). I don't see how you can hate from outside the club...you can't even get in...look at me now. I'm gettin' paper. (Sorry...got a tad bit carried away.)

Thanks again. That's all folks!

--Kay

The End

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