It’s a nice night, for South Carolina. It’s warm, but I don’t really mind. There is a strong breeze, which is nice. I put on a long sleeve shirt before coming out, hoping that it would be a little cooler than it is, so I just roll the sleeves up and accept the weather as it is.
I take a seat on the deck that juts from the back of the house. It’s well above the ground, and gives a decent look at our backyard. It isn’t much; here not a lot grows great. The grass is scrubby on account of the sand, but that’s ok too. I’ve never really cared about lawns.
The fence juts up at the edge of the year, leaving a small path before the lake starts. The fence is nice, as far as fences go. It isn’t an eyesore to look at, but our small dogs tend to get out through it. So we recently added a smaller mesh fence around the bottom. It’s less attractive, on the whole, but I still don’t mind.
When we first moved down here, I was excited to be moving onto a lake, but it turns out the lake isn’t beautiful or exciting in the way most are. It’s smaller than I expected, which is ok, but it’s not clean at all. Our neighborhood has forbidden doing anything on it, as well. You can’t fish anymore (even though some people still fish on it), and you can’t boat or swim in it either.
I figure everything is as it should be, though. I can’t change it, and I’m ok with that. I bring my pipe out. I bought it as a joke, on a lark, but I actually find I enjoy it sometimes. Usually on nights like this, with the nice breeze and everyone indoors.
The world sleeps as I light it up, with some difficulty due to the breeze, but I get it to catch and light most of it. I take some puffs and look up at the stars like the philosophers of old. Wondering what makes it all go around, but I’m young and full of pretence. I look up and see the works of science; I look up and think I know more than I do. And that’s ok.
I don’t usually inhale much when I smoke, I’m used to cigarettes with filters, but I’ll take a few real drags and feel the nicotine buzz run through my head. It’s a feeling I enjoy, and it makes me wonder why I don’t smoke more. I guess it was just something I never really took to.
I look out over the lake to the houses on the other side. I almost wish I were in the wilderness, just looking at real untamed nature. I never really mean it, though. I grew up in small towns; I’ve seen enough untamed nature. I find that I like the city. The bustle, the cars, the sounds, everything; it all makes me feel right. Knowing that I’m close to everything is a good feeling.
I suppose that with my meager age, beyond my teen years, nature has lost its poetry. Most of it, anyway, I still have a great fondness for the moon. I can look at the moon for hours, and feel like it’s only been minutes.
Everything feels ok tonight.