Save MeMature

Something I wrote. Feedback, please?

"Get out!" I'm screaming, I know, as I point to the door, finger shaking.

He looks shocked, but my expression drops from furious to dangerous as I grab hold of his upper arm and physically drag him out of the house with strength I didn't even know I had.

"Never come back, asshole." I snarl, and I slam the door, sliding the deadbolt home.

With that, all the previous strength leaves me, and I lean against the wood, sliding down to land on my knees, cheek pressed to the worn paint.

And I cry.

"Luci?" There's feet on the stairs, creeping and quiet.

"What?" There's tears running down my face, and I know I must have splotches of red on my cheeks and rings around my eyes, and I don't care. I want her to know what she does to me.

Alicia doesn't look much better. Her clothes are rumpled, hair messy despite her attempts to smooth it down. I feel a flash of something unknown before it turns to anger.

"What were you thinking?" I demand, eyes fiery.

She seems shocked, and she stammers "I- I don't know, I didn't-"

"Damn right you didn't! Were you just going to sit there and let him rape you? Saying 'no' over and over again and not actually doing anything as if it would make him stop?!" I'm yelling at this point, and I have to take a deep breath to calm myself.

Alicia just stands there, her mascara no longer immaculate and her lipstick smudged.

"I'm going for a smoke," I mutter, pushing past her.

"You shouldn't-" She starts, and my voice takes on a tone that hints at an explosion if she's not careful.

"Do you really think you're actually going to be able to stop me?" I sound mocking. I hate it.

I reach the kitchen, my footsteps landing with a heavy, final thud. My hands automatically seek out the packet of smokes hidden at the bottom of the red vase.


I take a long drag from the cigarette, holding in a lungful of smoke before releasing it, coughing slightly. I'm outside, and the chilly fall air isn't pleasant against my skin, but it's better than going inside and facing my dysfunctional 'family', if they could even be called that.

I sigh, and lean my head back against the cool brick.

I'm so tired.

I'm not sure how much longer I can do this.

The End

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