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My feet alighted what appeared to be solid ground, though somewhat more forcefully than I had expected from the rapid deceleration at the end of my fall. I dropped to the floor and found I had no energy to rise again. So I lay here in the darkness and listened for sounds of the monster following down the fox-hole.

But there was nothing. It was dead silent. Almost, too silent. I couldn't even hear my own breathing.

I stamped my foot on the floor, to find no sound reaching my ears. Furthermore, I didn't even feel the impact.

I peered into the darkness for some kind of explanation, but the revelation I received was far from helpful. I say, "received," because that is exactly how it felt. As though somebody had given me the answer. I cannot explain how, or why, but I knew, as though it had been one of me memories all along, that this was not darkness. There was plenty of light here: there was just nothing to see!

Wait? This made no sense! How could there be nothing to see? Nothing at all? In any case, how could I be seeing a place where there was nothing to be seen, and yet not be hearing that which has clearly real? Or, maybe...

I glanced at my feet to see...

Nothing!

I raised my hand and found only a fading silhouette.

I bellowed into the... Nothingness.

"What is happening?"

Or I would have, but there was no sound. Not even a vibration in my throat. Did my throat even exists anymore? Upon looking down, I saw that my chest didn't.

Nonetheless, some manner answer to my unvoiced question appeared in my head. I was going to find Sahrai.

How did I know that? How did I know it could even be found? Come to think of it, how did I know anything about anything I had experienced? That the fox had reeked of Sahrai? That the it couldn't see me? That the obelisk had been the reason it couldn't see me? I thought back further and further, and found much of what I knew, I shouldn't! Was this all being implanted in my mind by something external, or were these snippets of truth gleaned from some hidden memories of my own? Were they even truth?

So many question whirled around my head, and for every one that I asked, two more popped up. For any one answered... well, that much is evident!

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23 COMMENTS ABOUT THIS STORY RSS

protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "Haha well now I have to ruin where I was going with it....The Sahara Inn....then the letters 'T,h,e,a,n,n' burn out"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Rac7hel "hmmmmmmmmmmmm this makes me think! >X|
(that's a cool think face, isn't it)

I like what you did, I have a lot of ideas for ways to tie that in with the story. And I like how the name of the inn is dangerously similar to Sahrai. It makes it sound very ominous. Maybe I'll write again finally. . . :?
"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "The punctuation might be a little rough around the edges, but I could care less. I just wanted to get the idea out, I wasn't concerned with working on it for five hours before posting it."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "Perfect, I was thinking that, with the next chapter, one could jump back to the dreamworld he's in again. Then a little later we could come back to this storyline to build a story behind whats happening."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "I have the perfect next chapter for this...Oh man I'm so smart haha!"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "Exactly what I was going for, bringing it back again and again to the beginning."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "How very astute of you Redhat. Yes it does symbolize something. I put it in to symbolize the ignorance of the character and the impending danger that surrounds him, but which he doesn't realize. He is the moose who is ignorant to the stalking creature in the dark. What seemed like a small fox at first turned out to be much more."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Rac7hel "Nice post! What an interesting conundrum we have here..."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for EilDard "I thought this addition might add some more mystery to an already fantastically mysterious story, and tie up a couple of perceived loose ends. I hope you like it!"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Rac7hel "I don't think you can call anything "just plain bad"... :/

I liked the line about the fox's essence; It's important to the story that the fox and Sahrai have some sort of connection, and that seemed like a creative and perfectly acceptable way to express that idea.

I see what you mean about the grammar, doc, but it's mostly run-on sentences and extra commas. Those aren't really that hard to overlook. I just hear it in my head and pause at all the pause indicators, and keep going. I know it's incorrect grammar and I would certainly edit it before publishing it, but I don't think it's nearly as bad as your comment makes it sound.
"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "I don't think I'm all together sure which way is the right way to take that."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for seldom "Fluent and assured. (sp?) both branches, really satisfying read - nice job"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Rac7hel "I really never intended to take it anywhere, so wherever you want to go is fine with me ;)"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "Good, I didn't want to ruin the idea for this story, so I stuck as close as I could to where I thought you were taking it."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "Okay I dunno why but the paragraphing @&!#ED up halfway through and I had to go back and reparagraph everything, and then I ended up with that spaced out sentence near the top that is supposed to be a new paragraph, that for some reason I can't fix. In fact I think its happened twice up there. Just so everyone realizes why its like that."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "I really hope I did this story justice. It was what I perceived when I saw that it was listed under horror."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Writers_Block "Beautiful, its too bad no one will take the time to notice this. They're all too wrapped up in more 'fun' and easy to write posts. But I will shower and come back to write an addition to this. And I will pay homage to you Rach with my detail."
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for DrPinch "Moody!"
protagonize: author profile thumbnail for Rac7hel "RIP Albert Hofmann, and thank you... ;)"

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