Two cousins under the influence of marijuana, witness a robbery and murder by a gang of chopper anarchists. After they check the place out to find out what happened, they are mistaken for suspects by the police and are now wanted both by the police and the chopper anarchist gang.
From: Nathan White (SoCal_High_nate@hotmail.com)
To: Eric Carter (firstname.lastname@example.org)
Subject: Your long awaited book ;)
Santa Monica, California
Just a typical day in California. Few cars roaming by, people going for a midday jog on the beach and many, many outcasts taking hits and making drug deals in alleys. Punks, chopper freaks, gang members, emos, Goths, whores etc. That kind of thing. Hell, it was all one big circus.
And then there was us, Nathan and Ryan high as a kite, strolling the streets. Searching for ‘the meaning of life’ in two joints, in our 24 and 22 respectively. I was a university drop-out and a damn good bar waiter. 30$ every night and 45$ in the weekends? Not too shabby. Even though I spent my best years in University of Santa Monica, that shit wasn’t for me. Ryan on the other hand did finish college, with a degree in Public Relations. He was too good of a clothing store clerk to get a normal job though. “Fucking hell dude! Everything’s funny.”
Now let me tell you some things about Ryan. He is my cousin and most of all, my best friend ever since he was born. We were just like brothers. His interests are bikes and weed. You know, biker guy, likes to party, beer and music, yeah. And that’s probably the main stuff you need to know about him.
Dazed and sweaty, we eventually drifted off into a narrow road for our favorite part of the city: the Bench. No, not a bench, The Bench. It’s just your average everyday bench only that it overlooks a big part of the city (And is almost 24/7 occupied by us). Entering a small alley, I stumbled on the body of an unconscious (or dead) junkie and reached for Ryan’s hand to climb the stairs to the Bench. “Here we are my brother! On top of the world!” I shouted and laughed high as I was. Sitting on the bench, I took a hit and waited for Ryan to stop giggling.
Then we just sat there for an hour straight, looking at nothing but the horizon. Ryan then took the courage to break the silence and asked “Why did the chicken cross the road?” and waited for an answer with a tilted head, a stupid smile and bloodshot eyes. “Fuck if I know!” I answered and left out a big noisy burp. “Because he wanted to be… mainstream!” he said and we both almost fell off the bench laughing our asses off to that horrible joke. Oh, classic Ryan! Suddenly, we heard loud shouting and swearing not too far behind. We glanced at one another and went to see what was going on. Peeking out from a building corner, we could tell that the voices were coming from the convenience store just across the street.
At first we thought it was just nonsense angry shouting, but then we walked closer to the store and the words came clearer to assure us that this was a robbery. “Put the fucking money on this bitch and get down or I’ll paint the walls with your brains!” the angry voice threatened. Then we heard what we presumed to be a struggle, but a few seconds later, he did paint the walls. Two or three shots were heard and then Ryan saw a man getting out of the store running towards a parked motorcycle in the passenger seat. The man looked at us and Ryan mentioned he flicked us off, but I couldn’t see clearly. He put on a helmet and they drove away. I was too high out of my mind to focus on them. “Dude, let’s go see if the things are okay” Ryan recommended.
I followed his lead and when we got into the store, Ryan stepped aside and threw up on the chocolate stand. The man was shot twice in the head and his eyes had fallen off. Having ran with a gang once or twice, I freaked out too, but managed to remain calm in the sight of a corpse. Partially regaining consciousness, I told Ryan we had to go. Not long after we had turned around, an Asian woman ran in panic inside the store and cried out possibly the clerk’s name. She saw the body and broke down in tears. Ryan gave me a look of empathy and sorrow, but the woman turned her head and pointed at us. “You!” she shouted. She was pissed and mournful. A dangerous combination likely to cause great damage. People had gathered outside the store and stared at us, while sirens were made audible from far away. We were totally screwed.
She screamed something in Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese or Japanese and started crying. “Chill out ma’am, it wasn’t us” Ryan tried to reason. However, she didn’t seem to care and continued crying, swearing and accusing us. “Are you serious? Let’s fucking go!” I shouted and grabbed Ryan from his shirt and ran as numerous cop cars surrounded the area. We rushed clumsily out of the store and we swerved into the backstreets. This however, was sure to alert the cops, who were trying to calm us down and stop us as they engaged in a chase. We maneuvered inside the narrow alleyways panicking. The junkies and other people in the blacklist had abandoned the place.
All the running and swerving made us punchier as we were still high. “Stop right there!” a bald officer commanded. Ryan pushed me to the left and he went right, prompting us to split. “Shit! Split up boys” the bald officer said and tailed me. He continued to chase me and tried to convince me to stop. I took a sharp turn in the next apartment complex and kept looking for a spot to hide. Finally, I noticed a big ol’ dumpster oozing with stench. Luckily, I was out of sight and hopefully I would have enough time to hide. I dove inside the stinky abyss and buried myself in garbage. The smell was indescribable. I heard a muffled conversation from outside. “Shit man. I think we lost him” I heard an officer say. The other one burst out on him.
“Oh shut the fuck up Sanders, and scout the damn area!”
I couldn’t last much longer in there. I don’t know how much further it would be before I threw up my whole digestive system. It smelled worse than Ryan taking off his shoes, I’m telling you.
I tried to sink deeper inside the trash. “Alright, nobody wants to get hurt here” Sanders said. “So just come out and we will talk like men. We just want to ask you a few questions” he finished. The angry cop sighed and continued to search. I heard the dumpster cover creak open. “Jesus Christ Sanders, what the fuck are you doing?” the angry cop asked.
“I’m searching, what do you think I’m doing? Gimme a fucking break, Mark” Sanders replied.
“You think he just dove in? What is this, CSI?”
“You never know” Sanders said and closed the cover with a sound a bit heavier than a standard “clack”.
After about 5 minutes of near-asphyxiation, the cops gave up the search. I heard talking from further away, and I tried to peek from the lid, catching some fresh air. Mark became angrier in frustration. “Fuckin’ Hell we did lose him!”
“Oh man Tallboy is gonna be so pissed at us…” Sanders sighed.
“Fuck him; I don’t give a fuck what Hudson-”
“Woah-ho-ho hey there boys!” A tall man interrupted them. He had another cop with him.
“Good evening Hudson and Walsh!” Mark’s tone jumped.
“Did you get ‘em yet?” Hudson asked.
Mark hesitated. “Umm we were close-”
“Ha, told ya! Now pay up!” Hudson said and waited for Walsh.
“Motherfucker…” Walsh sighed and handed over a roll of cash to Hudson.
“Look, we’re sorry about-” Sanders went to say but was soon interrupted by that super-dick Hudson.
“Ooh do I love working with you boys! Keep up the good work my friends. Later!” he then gave a sassy as fuck wave and left with Walsh, while counting his money and whistling.
Mark and Sanders then looked at each other, shrugged and left. I quickly jumped out of the Garbage of Satan and threw up in the corner.
That was pretty heavy. “Psst!” I turned and looked around surprised. “Psssst! Up here!” someone whispered. I looked up and saw Ryan on a rooftop. “What the fuck, how did you get there?”
“I’m just awesome.”
He then jumped on the dumpster and came to me. “Jesus, you stink. Did you…?” I shrugged. “What was I supposed to do, dummy?” He hit his forehead with his palm. “Whatever, come on man we gotta bail” I said. That’s about everything that happened that day. Then we just laid low for a couple of days before shit hit the fan again! J
We miss u brah, come visit us sometime.