Camilla and I arrived at the hospital later that evening. We made our way quietly through the halls and up the stairs to the third floor. Logan’s room was halfway down the third corridor on the left of the main one. We entered and my eyes immediately went to my brother where he lay on the bed. The machines keeping him alive beeped constantly in the background; a sound I had become accustomed to in my many visits.
I went across and took the seat closest where his head lay. I took his hand in mine and smiled wryly. “Hey big bro” I said. I got no reaction; not that I had expected one. “I know you can hear me in there you big dummy. Please wake up”. A tear rolled down my cheek. “I need you now more than ever”. Still nothing. “We all miss you. Me, Camilla… Alyssa”.
Camilla came across and sat on the seat next to me; placing a comforting hand on my back. “Hey Logan” she said.
“I’m guessing mom and dad haven’t been to visit again since day one?” I asked his body. “Of course they haven’t. They care more about their fucking reputation than they do their son”. We spent the next half hour recounting everything that had happened since our last visit; including the previous night. Logan remained motionless.
The door behind us opened and the doctor walked in; accompanied by my parents. He spotted us by the bed and came across. “You’re all here” he said. “That’s good”.
“Why are you two here?” I asked them.
“The doctor said he had some information that we all needed to hear and that we had to come down” Dad said.
“I am afraid it is for the family only” the doctor said. Camilla nodded and stood, squeezing my shoulder before leaving the room and closing the door.
“Well go on. What is it?” Dad asked.
“Logan’s condition is not improving. We have removed the bullets and done all that we can, but there is nothing more we can do at this moment. I called you here today to ask you to make a decision as a family”.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“The only thing keeping your brother alive is the life support machines” he said, turning to me. “You all need to make a decision. Do you want to keep him on life support, or can we turn off the machines?”
“No you fucking cannot!” I said. I looked to my parents who looked at each other. Dad nodded and mom turned back.
“Turn them off” she said.
“WHAT?!” I screeched, standing up and facing them. “NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT!”
“It’s not your decision to make Mia” Dad said.
“WE CAN’T JUST GIVE UP ON HIM!”
“Turn off the machines doctor” Dad said.
“NO!” I threw myself in front of the machines, blocking the doctor from accessing them. “HE IS GOING TO SURVIVE!”
“Mia calm down” Mom said.
“I FUCKING HATE YOU BOTH!” I screeched. A nurse came into the room and dragged me out. I watched in horror as the doctor went and flicked the switch on the machine and pulled the breathing apparatus from Logan’s mouth. The heartbeat monitor began to beep faster. “LOGAN!” I struggled to get back to his side but the nurse restrained me. The heartbeat monitor flat-lined. I sobbed and stopped resisting. Just like that he was gone. I fell to my knees and the nurse tried to heave me up again. I wept into my hands. Then I heard a beep. And another. And another. The heartbeat monitor was beeping again. I looked across. Logan’s chest was rising and falling. He was still breathing.
“This is remarkable!” the doctor said, checking various screens. “He is breathing on his own!”
“So what does this mean?” Dad asked.
“You’ve got a fighter for a son” the doctor said. “He is not ready to die yet. Apparently he does not need the machines”.
“So he’s surviving?” Mom asked. She exchanged a look with dad. Was that disappointment I saw?
“Indeed he is”. I leapt up from where I was and raced to his side, taking his hand in my own again.
“That’s it Logan. Keep fighting big bro. Come back to us”.
Mom and dad left with the doctor and Camilla came back in. “What happened?” she asked.
“They turned off his life support machines… mom and dad gave the order… but he is breathing on his own now” I beamed. “They were going to let him die… but he said screw you and is fighting back”.
“That’s our Logan” Camilla said, retaking her seat next to me.