And then the silence broke. But my head didn't really notice it.
"So, um, I was thinking... I mean, considering... What with Daniel and..." Was Brad at a loss for words? Ha, I'm not sure if this is good. I waited for him to get his words out, as I held Daniel, impatient to slam the door in his face.
"All I'm trying to say is... maybe it's a good idea if we... got back together, you know?... But a little more than back, if you get what I mean. I mean, you know, marry?"
Ahem. What? Didn't catch that, my brain is taking a little while to register this. Good idea, get back together, you know MARRY?!
"That's your good idea? To ruin my life again? This is -- Ridiculous!"
I swerved around and hit my head on the door. Daniel seemed to be getting a kick out of the commotion, laughing.
"Crap. This is enough. Shit, shit, shit!"
I walked upstairs without saying anything to Brad, assuming that he knew to walk away. I put Daniel into his crib and absent-mindedly turned on the fan and patted his little chest as he gurgled.
I have been in a total frenzy the past 2 days, and this, well this is not a good idea. Nowhere near. I mean, there is just, ha, no possible way for this to happen. It's just... The point is, it's Brad Joyce. Who marries people like Brad Joyce without getting a divorce after six months?
"Oh Daniel! What do I do about this bastard?! Why is all of this coming at me so suddenly?" I didn't expect an answer but I couldn't breathe properly and I felt like I was suffocating. This toxic fume was filling up my lungs and eyes couldn't focus and all of this was crushing in on me! Just 'cause I'm in love with you, doesn't me you can wind me up for a goddamn year and then use me as one of your games once you get bored! Damn, I'm still in love with this guy, I can feel the butterflies in my stomach, and even though they're dead, they're still frigging there! Marry BRAD?!
Crap, I didn't say no.