Half way though my alloted time left. Already I could feel my body slowing and my will depleting. Images of my friends hyper and playing football were the only things that kept me from going under.
I lay in bed on sunday, recovering from chemo. This one was worse than any of the others, I was exhausted and had no appetite whatsoever. My parents were worried, but I remained in good spirits, determined to live out my final days laughing and smiling. While I was bed ridden, I added to my death folder. Heidi came to visit me, bringing with her a joy that surged in my heart like no other. We talked through the afternoon, I helped her with our math homework and we spoke of Robert and her boyfriend James.
I was back at school on tuesday, my friends welcoming be back with open arms and wide grins. Right in the back of my mind, I wondered what they thought about hugging someone who would be dying very very soon. School days blurred into one lump, my mind only focusing on the best parts which were usually at lunch time or before school where everyone sung to random songs. How heaven could be better than that I do not know.
Football on friday was much different than usual. Before we began practice, Miss Davis gathered us round. She had three bald headed girls in that circle who were all laughing and were generally pumped for the fun enhanced by endorphins and just being with each other.
"I didn't mention this before," Miss Davis started, "But I am so proud of you, Heidi, and your friends. For nine teenage girls to give up their hair just to make each other feel better, well, I have never been so proud to teach at this school." Emotion flowed from her, sucking my heart into an elastic band, compressing my love towards Miss Davis into a rock so tight that I had to laugh to dislodge it.