At first, I must confess, I was only doing it to make Rob happy again, as I always did; making people happy. Nothing was worse for me than feeling as helpless as I did then. Rob had to go home after we talked for a bit, a little of this and that. He wanted to know all I knew on the subject, which was very little. I gave him what few scraps of advice I had picked up from books and such; to make her smile a lot and do stuff to help her. Common sense stuff. But after I had prayed once, part of my soul latched onto her and she felt like part of me, even though I had never met her. I began praying for her.
Every night, my hair damp from my bath, I would lie in bed and pray for all the normal stuff; for my friends to be happy and not to let misfortune fall upon them, ect. Then I added an extra bit on.
'Dear God, if it is the only way to keep Dana alive, give me the tumor. Let me die in her place. Don't let her die, Lord. Give her strength, my strength if you must. Give the whole family anything they need to make sure she recovers in the best environment possible.'
And that was all I could do.
No one knew about that, I could tell no one because they would not believe me, and those who did would say I did the wrong thing.
But I think I did.