Do you want to know why I'm really late, Latimer? Why I'm really late? Because I'm bored. That's right. Spell it. B.O.R.E.D. Bored. Make sense to you? Behind that hazy sense of lucidity you must have some level of awareness. Now, I apologize for sounding vexatious, but let me, if you will, present, what shall I call it, a vision, Latimer, a new direction for us, all of, us.
Excuse me while I climb up here, and I promise, standing on your desk, Latimer, I will do nothing to ruffle any of your prized novelty office knick knacks. It is not my intention to divide, you see but rather to be the bright yellow post-it note that binds us all to a common goal.
I see I've gathered a crowd and I, for one, salute you all for your open ears. This, my friends, is a new era. I see it in all your faces. Not a want for change. Not an opportunity for change. But a change that has already begun. It has begun in the lunch room and carries forward every time we convene in the smoking area. i see you non smokers there with us. I see the solidarity of an office that is tired of the interstate and ready for the off ramp of a new direction.
I tell you all that I have been to the water cooler, and mingled. We, collectively have magazines that have been unread. Mindless browsing that has been unintended. I have seen many of you let working interfere with a need to just dance. Well, today, this stops. All of it. Today we form a chain so linked that even the hammer of upper management cannot, will not, shall not, break it!
Ms. Sharpe, you did not wear that red dress today to collate binders, did you? Anthony, your will may have been broken by sorting mail, but your spirit resides in the collective. Our collective! The Word Processors of yore will be the online flash games of your future.
And so I say to you all, we may have come here to do office work, but we starting, today, at 9:45 am, we play our personal fiddles. No one, not a chance, not you, not you, nor you, starting this minute, and not today, not tomorrow and not the next day - no longer will we let our music die with us!
Who's with me?
"Michael!, Are you going to answer me? Why were you late?"