Raw Emotions

Tso sat alone on his bunk looking down at the floor. Things were getting so bad, and he wished he knew what to do to make them better. Nothing seemed to be going right. The Trade Federation had invaded, his friends were fighting, they were no closer to finding the Dark Jedi than they had been when they started, and he was beginning to wonder why he was even with the group. After all, what difference did it make whether they found the Dark Jedi now. What would they do when they found him? Were they simply out for revenge? Was it all about getting even with this being? And better yet, was this revenge worth destroying one another?

Tso put his head in his hands to stop the pounding. Maybe when this is all over I should just walk away. Maybe I should see if I can find another job on some other freighter and forget the whole thing. What does it matter anymore?

What about your fellow crewmen? he argued with himself. How would they feel if you just gave up the search? Wouldn’t you want them to find your murderer and see to it that he was brought to justice if you were the one killed?

“No,” he actually said aloud. “I wouldn’t care. I’d be dead.”

That’s true enough, he argued again. But what if this guy hurts someone else because you didn’t do anything to stop him? Then how would you feel?

And that was the clincher. No matter what else happened, Tso had to help find the Dark Jedi so that he wouldn’t hurt anyone else. It didn’t matter to him that he got revenge for himself or his crewmen. All that mattered was preventing the murderer from doing anyone else harm. That, above all, was his reason for staying with the group. As long as he kept that in mind, he’d be able to go on.

Just then, the door opened and Lialla sauntered in. Looking up at him, she smiled weakly. “Sorry,” she said as she spotted him. “I didn’t realize anyone would be in here right now. I just needed a rest.”

Tso stood to his feet. “No. Don’t apologize. I’ll leave.” And he began to head for the door.

She put her hand on his shoulder. “Wait,” she said. “Don’t go.”

Tso paused and looked her in the eye. “What is it?” he asked with concern.

She lowered her gaze. “I just thought that maybe we could talk, that’s all.”

Tso was stunned. “You want to talk to me?”

“I need to talk to someone that isn’t a Jedi,” she told him, “someone that knows more about the real world. I think Geldar and the others are great, but they have grown up in different worlds. I need someone I can relate to better.”

Tso was shocked. He’d never expected this. “Okay,” he said, not knowing what else to say.

“I also need someone to talk to that...”she paused for a moment as if she didn’t know if she should finish her sentence. Finally, she decided it must be okay to trust Tso because she said, “I also need someone that I don’t feel an attraction towards.”

Tso’s look of surprise was evident on his face even to a human. “Whoa!” he muttered. This woman moves fast, he thought to himself. Unless I’m mistaken about who she’s attracted to.

“I must confess,” she told him. “I’m kind of surprised that I can feel such an attraction so quickly after meeting someone. I didn’t used to be that way.”

Tso gave her a blank stare as she turned to walk away from him. She placed her hand to her head as if her head hurt, and she held her stomach as if she were going to be sick. “Everything is just happening so fast. I wish I knew what to do.”

Tso didn’t know what to do either. He just stood there silently and listened to her talk. “I just met him a few days ago, and it was like this instant connection. Now, though, I’m not sure what to do. Everything’s coming apart at the seams. First the Trade Federation invades and then I meet him, and I’m torn about what to do as far as he’s concerned. Then, to top it all off, I find out Kylarra’s dead and I’m stuck in the middle of some huge Dark Side Jedi whirlwind that’s twisting my mind in circles.” She finished her monologue with a final growl of frustration as she turned back to face him. “What should I do?”

Tso was, at first, at a loss for words, but as he saw her waiting for him to respond, he just stated, “I’m not sure I could tell you anything that would help.”

Lialla lowered her gaze once more then looked back up at him. “I just feel so helpless.”

Tso moved over to her and put his arm around her shoulders. “Me too,” he said, and she looked into his big, dark eyes with a smile. And then, after she stared for a moment, it was as if she suddenly saw something she hadn’t seen before.

“I’m sorry,” she said to him as she pulled away. “Here I am blabbering about my problems to you, and I never even bothered to ask you about yours.”

Tso lowered his gaze this time. “I’m fine,” he told her.

She smiled sadly at him and gave him a hug. “You’re a great guy, Tso,” she said. “You really know how to put others first. That’s a great quality that few men rarely have.” She pulled away. “If you were a human, I bet every woman in this base would be swarming you.”

Tso smiled. “It’s a good thing I’m not human then,” he joked.

She smiled as well and kissed him on the cheek. “You’re just as cute as one, though,” she said as her smile broadened. Turning she said nothing else as she made her way over to one of the bunks and climbed into it.

Tso stood there for a moment in thought as he watched her crawl into bed. “What was that all about?” he wondered curiously as he wiped his cheek and turned to leave. “I swear I’ll never understand humans as long as I live.” And with that final thought, he opened the door and left.

The End

0 comments about this story Feed