Falling

I'm falling, losing, slowly destroying. Fire burns, dwindles. A representation. I've lost. It's gone, the grip that was tightening, the order that had straightened things. The dreams of futures and friends. Sadness settles like wet sand.

Shh, darling, everything's fine.

It's normal. Of course it is. I'm a teenager. Silent breakdowns are always normal. Abnormalities are always normal for teens.

Here, take some pills, they'll make you happy.

Just as long as no one sees, no one knows, no one cares. I'll be left to my own devices, where I sink, disappear and disintegrate, reconstruct myself to someone strange, off.

So tired, lately.

Breathing is weird. Requires almost concious effort, at times.

It's okay, baby, just close your eyes. Hush.

Silent words of comfort. Meaningless. Crumbling.

Destruction, inward, not of the body, but of the mind. Smiles are plastered-- not fake, but not necessarily wanted.

To survive, you have to want to survive. To get help, you have to accept it.

I reject it. I don't want it. I am independent. I don't need help. I was raised like this. I am independent.

...Aren't I?

Everything's going to be alright, sweety, just rest a bit. Shh, now. Shh. I've got things under control.

The ghouls haunt not my dreams but my imagination. Steals away the grip, the tightening now loosening grip, losing it, falling, falling, gone. Sinking and drowning.

Red is not the color of blood. Red is the color of life.

and death is all the wrong colors. white of mourning

to be avoided.

Nothing is correct. We are all comprised of programs, recorded,... human?

Is there really such a thing?

Ones and zeros. ones and zeros.

Twelves

Elevens

Tens

Nines

Eights

Sevens

...and it's gone.

Shh. Quiet, silence. No need to cry anymore. Everything is over. it's all done. All gone.

The End

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