Have you ever breathed so slowly you thought you had died? When an unsettling calm washes through your body and coats your insides with something akin to anxiety but the fogginess makes it hard to tell? When your lungs are tied in knots from deprivation but your head pumps as a slow heartbeat in your ears to tell you you're still alive? Strange how the body can shut down. Strange, how if you are not conscious of it, the basic essentials can be stopped in a moment and gone.
You tell her to cry an ocean if the paces of the waves stay in time with her breathing. While your breath is even and lethargic, hers is a racing wind dotted with icicles of rain. She tells you to go to hell. You say you’re already there. The storm from her eyes makes itself known as her body is against yours. Then she stops beating your chest in anger to stare down into your dark eyes. Something is there that you can’t place because your head is groggy but hot like a fire that burns behind your eyes and in front of your brain.
She asks what’s wrong and you don’t speak. You are ripped into being as your breathing starts your heart and there is nothing she can do as it overloads.