Overcome; verb (past overcame; past part. overcome) 1. succeed in dealing with (a problem). 2 defeat. 3 (usu. be overcome) (of an emotion) overwhelm
This is a fan fiction I wrote some time ago, it consist of one chaper only.
As main characters it involves our nations sweetheart Cheryl Cole and Kimberley Walsh. If you are likely to be offended by the thought of two women having a relationship, please do NOT read, though I will not be going into any detail nor will there be any comments
Cheryl let her gaze wonder through the room full of people, full of people swaying their hips to the loud music, full of people forgetting the reality for a few hours, full of people letting themselves go. Sometimes she longed to do that to, she wanted to forget about everything, she wanted to forget how to worry, but grace didn’t seem to be with her in those moments. Her mind, always filled with a million thoughts, didn’t have the ability to forget, to forgive, to let go.
She let her eyes rest on the object of her desire. Sometimes she found herself wondering how anyone could be that beautiful. She was sure God put some special effort into her when He created her, aiming to create the most beautiful woman on earth possible. Cheryl thought that He achieved his goal. From the inner and outer Cheryl couldn’t think of someone better. Cheryl watched as her hips swayed perfectly to the beat, her hair flowing through the air, her hands resting on her partner’s tiny waist.
She shouldn’t be jealous of Nicola; she knew that only too well. She had no right to be jealous of anyone who interacted with her. She wasn’t Cheryl’s – as much as Cheryl wanted her to be hers. But as always when someone got closer to her than Cheryl liked, the nibbling pain in her stomach wouldn’t go away, her eyes were glued to the women, watching them closely, scared she might fly off the handle if Nicola gridded her body against hers that little bit more.
Cheryl averted her gaze back to the table, finding Sarah drowning another shot, Nadine giving her a reassuring smile. Cheryl felt her hand being taken by Nadine, felt it being squeezed and she assumed Nadine was mouthing some comforting words, though she couldn’t hear them over the music.
Cheryl turned her head away from Nadine, facing the dance floor, though looking nowhere in particular. Tears welled up in her eyes – it shouldn’t be like that. She shouldn’t get emotional about her anymore, she shouldn’t be upset about the situation anymore, and she shouldn’t need the reassuring smiles, squeezes and comforting words anymore.
She was meant to be strong and face this world without her, she wasn’t even alone – though that didn’t mean she wasn’t lonely.
She gave a fake smile as she spotted her dragging a tipsy Nicola back to the table, a wide smile over her face, reaching her eyes, those eyes Cheryl got lost into so many times. How she would love to get lost into them right now.
She watched as they both set down on the table, opposite of her, creating a far distance between them. She wanted to reach over, she wanted to grab her hand like Nicola still held on to it, she never wanted to let go again. She wanted that safety again only she could give her, she wanted to be strong with her, she wanted to love her.
She realized that her friends were engrossed in a discussion about their next cocktail choice but she didn’t pay attention to it, she couldn’t. Her eyes were still fixed on hers, as if that would somehow bring her close of she only looked long enough. She turned her head around and looked quizzically at Cheryl, whom in return tried to smile. As her face turned into a frown, Cheryl realized that not even her best fake smile could reassure her anymore.
Maybe she knew Cheryl too well. That thought scared Cheryl, knowing it would probably be better if they wouldn’t know each other at all. But would it? They say it’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. But she wasn’t meant to love her, she was meant to love someone else, but people don’t choose whom they love.
Would she have chosen to love someone else if she could? She didn’t find an answer as she starred into the deep blue eyes of her. Their eyes met once more, and her pervious laugh turned into a worried expression once again. Cheryl tried to smile once again, though she knew herself it was even weaker than her first attempt. She felt the emotions building up inside, her body battling with the tears which wanted so desperately to be free.
“Cheryl…” she heard her say, her hand reaching over for her arm.
As they touched Cheryl looked down, her eyes falling onto the huge ring adorning her hand. They weren’t meant to touch anymore, they weren’t meant to worry about each other anymore; her ring seemed to scream just the exact words at her. The tears won the battle as Cheryl stood up and left the club as quickly as she could, ending up on the balcony.
She looked up at the sky, but she could only find one star. It wasn’t a bright one, as if it lost its power to shine, as if it missed the other stars and didn’t want to shine alone. She cried hard as she looked up at it, reaching for it in her mind. She wasn’t meant to be with her anymore, as the star wasn’t meant to be at the sky alone. Because though her mind couldn’t forget what Ashley had put her through over and over again, though she would never forgive him for hurting her countless times, she couldn’t let go either – she didn’t have the ability to do that.
She felt her hand on the small of her back, she had followed her. “Cheryl please … “, she heard her say, “come back inside”.
She sniffed back another tear before she would reject her once more, though all she wanted to do was to stand by her side forever – no matter if they were to sit in this club forever, if they were to stand on this balcony forever, though thick and thin, she would stand by her side.
Another tear trickled down Cheryl’s face as she brushed her hand of gently, knowing she had missed her chance a long time ago.
“No Kimberley I’m sorry. I need to go, Ashley wants me home” She gave her a sad smile as she walked back in towards the exit. She didn’t mean to but she turned back around as she stood in the doorframe of the exit, she could still make out her frame standing on the balcony – she hadn’t moved, she still waited. But Cheryl didn’t come back that night; she never did - because Cheryl wasn’t one to take risks.
Kimberley smiled sadly as she walked back into the club over to her friends, she didn’t want to let go, but it was easier that there wasn’t a choice at least. She felt sorry for Cheryl for a moment, it wasn’t easy to be left behind, but it wasn’t easy to leave either.
If she could only find someone like Cheryl, someone who could make her laugh through the saddest times, who could always take the weight of her shoulders. But she knew there wasn’t anyone like that. She wouldn’t fall in love again, she had already given her heart away to the person she loved, and she only knew too well that she had Cheryl’s heart, as well.
If only she would let Kimberley take care of it.