Lily thought to herself,
"Will I ever be what I want to be. But really what is it I want to be?
There are so many things I like to do. And the world tends to tell you do what you love and nothing else will matter. That money will come. If a person can turn there true passions into profit then they are set. But that is the hardest part, the risk. Putting all you eggs into one basket, Believing that you can achieve greatness as long as you put in the effort it requires. Exposeing oneself artisticly. I mean I could go and get a degree in something and do what people do. Be apart of the working society. But then I feel I would be turning my back on my trueself. My art. I am so confused.. what do I really want to do.?
(rains pours loudly of the window as Mana stares out into the streets. She noticed a mother whisking her child in her arms after splashing in the huge puddles. she smiles and then sighs)
"I mean I ain't gettin any younger and as my mother constintly reminds me day and day out. what a joy that is, hearing the constant reminder that I need to get a career and I need to settle down if I want children. I mean I would love children someday but I have to find who I am first before even fatheming the idea of motherhood.
But there is this part of me that doesn't want to be defined as a career. Alot of time Iet so frustrated that I want to run away and excape to a place of tranquilty where no one can find me. place to relax to my own thoughts.hmmm
However ( she ponders) there is the money issue. I like money ( she grins). I like to have things, and to have luxeries I can't normally have without money. And I like to do without a man's influence. ugh*..what to do , what to do. I mean I know I must change something, I am completely unhappy in my life, but what am I to do..
( The door bell rings)
Lily says to herself in a quite breath " now who could that be, I wonder?)