Drunk in the Think TankMature

"Allllright, let's meet pearly white over here," Aleksander's heaving Alex over to the toilet, the man grinning like a lunatic and muttering about bananas. The rest of them are drunkenly playing Cards Against Humanity or, in Tammy's case, smoking and reading A Discovery of Witches so that she can discuss it with her book club.

Eve's managed to drink Derek (quite literally) under the table, so he's curled up under the glass top of the coffeetable with his head on a couch pillow and Ellen's pink fluffy towel over his shoulders. He's still trying to play, though, throwing cards at Eve's face every time it's his turn. Ellen appears to think that they're playing strip poker and she's losing, so she's down to a pair of boxers with cartoon squid on them and a bra printed with hula dancers. Eve is so drunk it's almost not even funny anymore, and at some point she managed to steal one of Tammy's unlit Austrian cigars and has begun imitating Bugs Bunny.

Aleksander, quite frankly, is perfectly fine attempting to work off his pleasant alcohol buzz with some calming chamomile tea. Alex and his stomach disagree with his plans.

"Okay, I'm finnne," Said man says, slurring the last word and tipping his head back, apparently done with his vomiting. Aleksander grimaces and lugs him up, flushing the toilet as he does so.

"Yeah, no. At least rinse your mouth out, here's some mouthwash, it's got to be better than what the inside of your mouth tastes like right now," the Russian tells him, but Alex seems to be confused, and tries to swallow the aggressively-minty-tasting fluid. "No, Alex. Nein!" He says, trying to make the him listen by using the foreign word.

"Bannnnaaaaannaaaassss and papayyyaaassss and Alekkks'nddeeeeeeerrrr," goes the German, and the other man gives up.

"I am not dealing with this right now. I have scones to eat and tea to drink. I could be taping the drunk idiots over there for blackmail instead of lugging your heavy ass over here!" Aleksander growled a little, but he looped his arms around the other man's shoulders and dragged him over to the couch tucked into the corner of the room.

"Come on," the Russian grunted, hefting him onto the furniture and then settling down on top of Alex, like a giant cat. "I could be over there with Tammy, being sober-ish, but noooo, instead I'm over here making sure you don't choke on your own vomit while you sleep," Aleksander muttered to himself, "I'm such a good friend. You owe me good tea and you can't complain the next time I make raisin scones." And with that, he settled down to rest. 

The End

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