Five little ducks went swimming one day,
Over the hill and far away,
Mother duck said “Quack, quack, quack,”
And only four little ducks came back.
Four little F***s went missing like that.
Four little F***s from a council flat,
A scary man threw one in a sack,
And only three little F***s came back.
Three little F***s went to the baths,
Left at the offy, then follow the paths,
Mother F*** had a heart attack,
And only two little F***s came back.
Two little F***s outside the church,
With an oversized coffin and a queasy lurch,
The police arrived and arrested Zach,
And only one little F*** came back.
One little F*** stands with a knife,
Bargaining inside for his dear life,
One gentle swing and a violent hack,
And no more little F***s came back.