Goosey Goosey Gander

Goosey goosey gander,
Whiither shall I wander?
Upstairs and downstairs
And in my lady's chamber.
There I met an old man
Who wouldn't say his prayers,
So I took him by the left leg
And threw him down the stairs.

The old man called the coppers
Who threw me into jail
For religious intolerance.
In court, they said. 'No bail'
The other charges cited
Were gross elder abuse
And voyeurism, and my
Species was no excuse.

 

 

 

Historical note:

I'm not sure how well this nursery rhyme is outside the UK, but it is thought to be about closet Catholics in the 16th century, hence ‘left leg’. The upstairs and downstairs refers to the hunt for priest holes and priests (old man) and their refusal to conform to the new protestant or common prayer book and say prayers in English rather than Latin.

Not sure why it's a goose, though. :D

The End

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