There really isn't much to ponder. Of course I'd love to live with Karem but this is only a temporary arrangement and I know that. But to live next door to her? And they seemed pretty nice, the Newlands had a pool too... But I'm going to act like I'm pondering it even thought the answer is so clear. I'm going to savor it. I'm staying here for the rest of my nineteen days.
I slept in the living room while I was there but Karem was in the shower. I decided to sneak into her room and close the door, laying on her bed. Suddenly, I flashed back to when Karem's ring had snagged onto my shirt, her fingers pressing up against my upper thigh and lap.I slipped my hand into my pants and bit my lip until it hurt but I couldn't stop.
Still imagining her exposing my belly a little, wanting to feel her hands on my skin. I must have lost track on time. My hand said to stop but my body said no. I heard the bathroom door open and her walking towards the room. My moans were muffled, I closed my eyes just enough to see her walk into the room silently as I continued. Why? Why did I stay? She must have thought that she was unseen. She was shocked but then entranced.
She stared at what I was doing for about thirty seconds but then seemed to come back to life. She swung the door as she ran out but made sure it didn't slam shut. I opened my eyes and heard her run down back to the bathroom. I finished and fixed her bed as if I was not there and walked into the kitchen. Why had I done that? I heard her re-open the door and get dressed in her room.
"Hey Karem, you want a quesadilla?" I yelled to Karem, trying to be nonchalant. She walked in looking shaken, "Sure. Why not?" She said, jittery as hell. "Are you okay?" I asked, basically mocking her. Why was I being so cruel? "Yup, yepzadoozies... So, how about you?" She stuttered, not willing to look at me in the eyes. "Just, my mind seems to be off somewhere else recently."
Karem cleared her throat and spoke. "I, uh... Just hope that YOU are doing well." She kept her eyes trained on the tile beneath her, her hands shoved into her pockets, fidgeting nervously. "You seem uncomfortable." I said as Karem gave me this look that I couldn't quite explain. "If you only knew Teke." I opened my mouth to talk but the microwave beeped then I handed her her food.
She opened the fridge to grab the sour cream. "Thanks." She said, then walking to her room and shutting the door. I sighed and thought for a moment. No reaction? No words? It is evident. My actions were useless. She doesn't even remotely like me that way, or find me attractive.
Stop expecting things that are impossible, Teke.