She transferred her hands to my arms and pushed me back. When the distance between us increased, my search for answers grew parched. However hard I stared, I could only see the empty deep in those eyes. A hollow nothing. The trimly cut bushes on a suburban lawn. I was the weed among the trimmings. I didn’t belong. I was the wilderness.
Nothing about her was wild.
Where were the stars in her eyes?
What made the darkness twinkle without light?
“No homo, bro!”
Three words. Two seconds. A wry smile and doomed realization.
She was jesting.
“Haha, Yeah! No homo.”
Blood surged through my ears. I clenched my jaw so as to stop the chattering of teeth. Rolled my hands into fists to keep myself from falling. Everything to keep the composed facade even if inside my heart was dying from its own blow.
Together, we took off wrought with amnesia. What transpired moments ago occurred in an alternate dimension. Who was the girl I was just then? Alone with a friend and yet a ghost. Bespoken and yet unheard.
My mind wanders to the memory of eyes that once enchanted me and now haunt me. She just wasn’t wild.
She couldn’t have the capacity to understand and it tormented me. She saw me, but could not see past the veil I used to mask my cobalt blue heart.
She was colorblind.
We walked until a fork in the hallway came into view.
“I have to go. See you tomorrow, Terry!”
We parted ways. One staggered while the other strode. One rejoined other friends while the other waited outside in the dissolving dusk.
One of them slept while the other continued to dream of flowers on Mars.