This is my interpretation of "Bite of the Daemon" by Xenitheon. It's a pretty good story so far, but I laughed far too much.
I was walking down the street after having my ass handed to me by a bunch of idiots. I could still hear them inside my head, so much that I couldn't hear myself think. I knew I needed to grow up and build muscles, so I decided to start trying!
My name is Zerk, because my dad is a geek. And because of that, everyone in school hates me and calls me things like "alien" and "spaceman" and "virgin boy"... but that was for another reason. I have no friends and my life sucks.
And the bullies suck too.
For some reason my mom gave me money to go work out. Then she ruffled my hair and encouraged me to go get some. I knew she meant for the girl I like but, get some? At a gym? Yuck!
I was on my way to the gym with the money in my hand, when a hooker came up to me.
"Hi, you have money, let's have sex!"
"Hm... well... sure!"
Then she started rubbing my crotch and kissing my neck. Then just as soon as she got into, she bit me!
"Ow! Too much teeth!"