17-year old Susan stands up to speak.
"Huh, hi, I'm Susan."
"Hi Susan", chime the gathered few who braved the snow storm to attend that early January meeting.
"I'm Susan, and I have a problem."
"Don't we all", someone mutters under his breath. Nobody laughs but him. He quickly stops, ashamed.
"My problem is that my womb has been genetically modified by NSA agents last year, so that it now corrupts any DNA it comes into contact with.."
Someone gasps loudly, then silence.
"Yeah, it.. it sucks. And I'm like, super fertile now. It all goes through, no matter what... Know what I'm saying? I'm sure you do. It so sucks because now, I can't be with my boyfriend anymore without birthing monstrous creatures a month or so later. And I totally don't know what to do with the misshapen things. So my new year's resolution was to try and keep them in. But.. but there's another on the way, and I can already tell I won't be able to keep it in for long. It totally sucks. Like, did that ever happen to any of you?"
"Well, we can see it happened to Wayne's mom," funny guy lets out. This time, people laugh a bit. Wayne really is ugly.
"Seriously, though, continues Susan. Anyone ever had that happen to them?"