Natural Selection's Trophy Case

A collection of fictional creatures made extinct by Natural Selection, as told by Natural Selection.

Welcome, welcome, one and all! I am just so pleased you could come here today to join me in this humble tour of my greatest accomplishments. I am convinced you will enjoy yourselves immensely, I am absolutely certain of it.

I, Natural Selection, will be your very own tour guide.

If you could follow me to the next room the tour can begin; don't mind the empty boxes, my crew just finished setting up the final displays yesterday. But! I assure you the exhibits are ready for their inaugural viewing by you, the public.

Alright, gather around, gather around. You in the back, if you could keep it down? Thank you very much.

I hate to be so cliché, but the best place to start is, of course, the beginning - what you see before you is my very first extinction. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: the Pogosaurus.

What was that? You've never heard of it? Well, there is a very good reason for that: the Pogosaurus roamed our planet for a mere 150 years before I managed to catch up with them. A blink of an eye, truly.

This thick headed creature (literally and figuratively) had two features that doomed it from the start. The first was that its only form of sustenance was a juice secreted by the toes of the monsters known as Tyrannosaurus Rex.

The only way to secure this life-giving nectar was to suck it out.

Needless to say, our good friend the T. Rex did not take kindly to this nuisance. However they were very heavy sleepers and would often sleep through the extraction process... until I made a slight change.

I found the Pogosaurus to be an unbearable bother, the way they were always getting in the way and were of no use to anyone. And their breath was simply atrocious. So I made sure that every baby they produced had razor sharp thorns on their tongues.

Suddenly the Tyrannosaurus Rex were not such heavy sleepers.

Oh, the second feature that assured the Pogosaurus of a short existence? Why, it was the reason they were named the way they were - they only had one leg.

Kind of made escaping from raging T. Rex rather difficult.

A bit crude, I'll admit, but I was just starting out. As we progress through the years you'll see my methods become much more... creative.

Now, if you'll turn your attention to the next display case, the tour shall continue.

The End

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