Not getting into class on time
Teacher: "Why are you here so late?"
Me: "I was talking to my housemistress about something."
Teacher: "For the third time in a row?"
Me (thinking): Oh damn...
Not brought homework to class
Teacher: "Where is your homework?"
Me: "I've just left it in my boarding house sir, I'll bring it next lesson."
Teacher: "No, make it tomorrow."
Me (thinking): Okay... need to write a 3 page essay by tomorrow... dammit.
Uniform in a state of utter disarray
Teacher: "What on earth have you done to your uniform? Why haven't you washed it?"
Me: "The washing machines in house aren't working, so I haven't been able to wash it."
Teacher: "A likely story, how do you know they aren't working?"
Me: "I broke them myself sir."
note: I had overloaded the washing machine the previous day... it got messy.