Chapter 2Mature

"What's up?" You talk, pretending that I hear you, but I stare ahead. Focused, determined to break down this invisible barrier between me and the other side.

What's on the other side, I don't know exactly, but it can free me, without the use of violence, I'm thinking about my fantasy. Where I control, I kill whom I choose, and no one yells at me for it, no that's not it. My fantasy needs pain and suffering, yes that makes it all the more real. I grip my arm tightly as if trying to gnaw through it with my bare hand.

You growl and wave your hand in my face trying to catch my attention; I can get very annoying can't I? Finally you just give up and turn to walk away, what's the use trying, I'm stupid aren't I basically nothing.

The earth shifts lightly beneath my feet and I turn to you smiling sweetly, my mask is unbreakable, nothing can penetrate my castle walls. I tell you as gently as I can, I broke the barrier, but there's still that world, but I left that world. All because of one special person. I went through hell and back, all for that special person. I smiled the best I could, all for that special person. That special person. Hm, horrible, making me feel like a toddler. Then again toddlers don't wish to lick and touch that crimson liquid now do they?

So many useless words in here aren't there? Of course there are. You stare at me, what the hell am I talking about, have I cracked already? You wouldn't understand unless you were that special person, but you can't be, because you are not that special person. I smile gently at you once more, walking ahead a bit then giving you a big hug taking a deep breath. You're special you're my friend, and one of my closest. The wind doesn't exist today, no there is only the sun. The satanic sun that shines down on me, you curse yourself for not putting on sunscreen.

I laugh because I have no use for that odd substance, and I absorb every bit of sun there is stealing it away from you. We walk around and meet up with another friend; she smiles the best she can for she has just gone through a tragedy. All before her special day too. So we cheer her up and keep walking and we meet another friend, or at least I think we're friends. He walks over to me and smiles, we laugh all of us. Then the air feels heavy as if there's a giant weight on my heart. But I hide it behind this smiling mask of mine.

He confesses, but it's only a bit he says, I tell him it's just a crush and keep walking, he asks if I'm looking for a boyfriend. I shake my head no and just smile again, reassuring him telling him I belong to someone else, but it's not that special person. I still long for that special person, but what was I supposed to do? I break down in my mind confused and scared, but on the outside I laugh as if the world couldn't get any better. Finally he goes home and we go home, you turn and walk to your house and I walk alone, thinking. Wishing, why can't that special person see, but I'm happy for that special person and now that special person isn't sad anymore.

And they wave goodbye to confusion...

The End

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