I didn't kill her! "An undeserved curse rebounds on the maker!" Alright, I visualized the flames, but the flames themselves devoured her! and I know why, because it was the time for her to be eaten up by her own mean spiritedness!
What a deliverance for me! I wondered if the Ancient Sumarians had breathed a sigh of relief at the time of her passing, and, no doubt, the other unfortunates who had had to live with her throughout her other incarnations. I pondered about the Buddha's concept of striving for non birth, and wondered if he mightn't have bumped into her at around about that time he thought of it. She'd no doubt, be eating her way out of an egg right now to start another life that would blight the lives of others.
Mervin and the boys were over the moon when they came in. Stoke was going up into the first division! The whole family had been visualizing it for well over a decade, taking nightly vigils where we saw the red and white scarves waving triumphantly in the air at the Victoria ground. Maybe that helped soften the blow, I don't know.
The truth is that Mervin had been driven to learning self hypnosis at the tender age of 9 as a means of coping with his mother! She tormented him about his hair, his glasses, his intelligence. He found it useful in helping him deal with her spiteful jibes and her deliberate mess making.
This led him on to learn how to hypnotize others. He could hold up his school report with D's down to F's, and all that Audrey would see would be straight A's, but, that couldn't change her sour nature, and she would say,"Clever dicks make me want to vomit you poxy box of maggots!
Never the less, he carried on in his pursuits and became a gifted hypnotist. Rasputin became his hero. Mervin went on to teach me everything he knew, we meditated together, practiced yoga, and Thai chi, we ate microbiotic food and concentrated on centering ourselves. We needed to, it was the only way to stay sane.
Once Audrey was gone, life did seem sweeter, but, with more time for reflection, I began to feel suspicious about Mervin's behaviour.
I'd often worried about him with other women. He was like a magnet to them and, like Rasputin, he captivated them at a glance. Of course, he only had to look at me to put my mind at rest, but every so often, I couldn't help wondering about things.
For instance, sometimes he'd have to nip out to the shop unexpectedly because he'd get this notion that the light bulb needed replacing. Then, he'd be out for up to five hours at a time! The shop was only two doors down! He'd always come back a new man though, eased somehow. Forgotten the light bulb! Just one look would ease my mind naturally, but as time wore on, I began to reflect on these instances and others.