Pain can be delusional.
My name was Sarah Wilmer. Thats all they knew about me. They didn't see me. They didn't hear me. I could walk through the halls of my school invisible: nothing more than a name.
At home it was worse. I wished I could be invisible, not always in the way, not always messing up, not always ruing everything. My parents fought every evening, and I knew it was my fault. I hadn't lived up to their expectations. I was a burden. Nothing I did was good enough.
I had my fair share of boyfriends. Self-absorbed, prideful dicks, everyone of them. But no Mr. Right would ever see me. The only guys that even recognized my existence were the predators. The ones that look for girls like me. They know were insecure. They know we lack self-confidence. And they know we'll give them head on the second date.
But finally, this time it was different. He was so romantic. Through all the other men I'd dated, he had waited patiently for me. And he promised he would never leave me. He would always be there for me. Isn't that the way love ought to be? How could I resist him?
Yet I was to afraid to enter a relationship with him at first. I didn't know how I could explain him to my friends and parents and teachers if anyone found ought. But eventually I just didn't care. I realized that they could think whatever they want; I needed him.
The first few days he just flirted with me, whispering sweet nothings into my ear. But soon enough he was starting to get physical, stroking every inch of my smooth skin, in my room, at night, when we were alone. And I loved every moment of it.
Finally, one night when I had just endured the worst day yet of sneering classmates, critical teachers, and yelling parents, he asked me if I was ready. At first I was hesitant, still wanting to hold on to my virginity a while longer, but he was so convincing. So seductive. I eventually said yes.
That night we waited until 3:00am before quietly sneaking out. It was pitch black and pouring rain. I left my pajamas on the front porch, running with him down the street to the back of the school parking lot in my underwear. We stood there for a moment, as I caught my breath. Then I slowly undid my bra and slid my panties down, dropping them in a small pile on the wet ground.
He drew close to me. I could feel how cold he was. And I could feel how hard he was. He caressed my skin, sometimes just kissing it, sometimes biting a little, all the while confessing his deep and devoted love for me. Then he began to rub me more and more, poking in just a tiny bit at first, playing with me. Finally he began to work his way inside.
The first time he penetrated me, I gasped out in both pain and pleasure. It hurt so bad, but felt so good! Then I saw the blood. I screamed, and pushed him away, but he reassured me that all girls bleed their first time. He also told me that the second time doesn't hurt as much.
Then he entered me a again, and again the pain and pleasure mixed into a blissful drought, and I drank deeply, enjoying every sip. A third time, a forth time, a fifth time, he forced his way inside of me, pushing deeper each time. By that point I was writhing on the ground, moaning in pleasure. And pain.
He began to play with me, pushing a vibrator deep into my pussy. Then he pressed his hardness against my breasts, sliding up and down between them as I shook and moaned. He played with my feet and hands, penetrating between my toes and fingers. He then traced around my anus several times before penetrating my ass.
I could hold back no longer, and began to cry out in orgasmic bliss. He came up and put his tip into my mouth, then pushed farther and farther towards the back of my throat. He hit the back wall, and then pulled out a little before pushing back in, deeper and deeper each time. I reached the climax of my orgasm right at the same moment he came, and as my throat filled with the warm, sticky fluid I swallowed dutifully and continued to suck him.
Having cum so hard and, I felt faint. And tired. The rain was on my face, and lightning lit up the sky. "Yes," I told myself. "This is the way to live." I closed my eyes.
The body of Sarah Wilmer, age 16, was found on October 17th in the back corner of a local high school parking lot. She was found naked with a small pink vibrator still running inside of her, a knife stuck deep into her throat, and deep cuts all over her body, including her breasts, hands, feet, and anus. Further investigations confirmed that the vibrator and knife were both owned by her. Investigators suspect suicide, but have not ruled out the possibility of rape and murder. No other DNA was found of the crime scene.