Hmmm

I told my mother that I was too tired to catch up with her and that we should chat tomorrow. She was a bit disappointed but I was still very hyper from my exciting evening. I headed up the stairs to my bedroom. 

Looking absently at my calendar, I realized that she was leaving again tomorrow. I guess she hadn’t had the nerve to tell me to my face. Oh how I love her. 

And alone again. 

Tomorrow would hopefully be my first uneventful day this summer. And I need it. I need to cool down and relax—forget about everything. Maybe I could ask my mom if I can go with her this time. I think Florida is the destination. Hmmm… 

I mean, most likely, she’ll say no but she’s always looking for time to catch up with me since she’s gone all the time. Maybe—keyword—I’ll ask her before she leaves … but I probably won’t. 

I sighed, flopping down on my big bed. What to do? What to do? I changed quickly out of my dress and curled up under the covers, trying to figure out my plans for tomorrow. 

In truth, I will not be able to just lie around the house being lazy. That is way too much time for me and “me time” leads to addressing my issues. Of course I don’t want to do that.  

Who wants to do that? I know I don’t. 

I closed my eyes to sleep some, fully aware that it was only about 7 o’clock. Then, admitting that sleep wouldn’t come to me, I got up quickly. Changing into some short shorts and a tank top, I climbed out my two story window. 

This was always the best exit. There was the jump down to the ground from the tree leaning by my window—sometimes. Other times, I’d take the risk, flying through the air to land on my feet. That was the more entertaining flight. There was always the risk of dying or hurting myself that I … loved. Because in reality, I believed that that was the only real risk I was taking. 

Back then at least. Back before Jason, when I was with Collin. I made myself believe the insane lie that being with him wasn’t a risk to me and that the only real risk was jumping off the roof to sneak out with him. As of now, things obviously have changed.

The End

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