Recently, Mercy had been hearing a lot of gossip. She loved gossip, because it was a delightful way to waste brain and time. The gossip wasn't just spoken either. Just this morning she recieved a piece of paper with excited words scrawled all over it, passing on someone's misdeed and another's misfortune. Because The Boss was hanging around, Mercy stacked it in the upper shelves or her office at once. Business as usual.
Mercy loved her job, even though she made just enough to scrape by. Through a window in her office, she could see her rickety little house, standing forlorn a-top a hill, its blank, dark windows staring back at her, lifeless.
Mercy was the Crime Keeper of the Society of Unrealistic Beings. She did a lot of filing, but the bulk of her work came down to deciding what punishments to issue her community based upon their past records. For example, if Greer the two-toed Yeti decided to rampage through human settlements to steal digits off other people's feet, Mercy would send him to the bottom of the ocean where nothing but he would have toes. If he decided to chop off his remaining toes just to fit in, then that was his problem.
Another piece of paper slid through the mail flap and landed on the floor by her hoofed feet. She bent over and picked it up.
"Mercy, did you hear? Gamble the wingless Gryphon broke into Mr. Acrophobi's plane shop and stole his lottery winnings. Isn't that just horrible?"
Mercy sighed to herself. It wasn't a weary sigh, it was more like exhaling after a deep, satisfying breath. Everybody knew she was Crime Keeper, which was why they gosspied to her needlessly. The reason why she liked gossip wasn't only because it was a brilliant waste of time, but because gossipers were always exaggerating for pleasure, hoping to see someone else get punished and embarassed. That itself was an act that weighed heavier on The Boss' crime scale than a brainless robbery. Even though the note was anonymous, The Boss had given Mercy the power to identify someone by looking at their writing. Mercy sent Mrs. GreenEar's note to the upper shelves, which was labelled "Gossipers", and began filling out her punishment. The more punishments she filled out, the more gold she earned and the more she loved gossip.