Another relationship going to the dogs but there is the real threat of danger here.
...tickticktick goes my marriage: not like a clock or seconds whizzing by but like heels clicking on a pavement...now running together until it's a constant buzz and I'm surrounded. When I open my eyes the world is still and he's shouting at me as if I'm deaf...there is no sound yet; his face is twisting out of shape, eyes sneering, nose charging and teeth squaring up for a fight.
'What do you want me to do?' I say - it's all I ever say; there is no other answer when you have no idea what you're involved in.
'Sort her out! I mean, you are a woman, you should know about these things.'
'You're a builder, so build a bigger house.' I didn't add that he should go live in it by himself.
'And what the hell does that mean? You obviously haven't heard a word I've said, have you? Where the hell are you Gina? I don't know who you are anymore.'
'She's in the nick, your precious daughter.'
'Been shoplifting again. If I had had my way this would all have been finished...'
'You started it with your constant bans and groundings. You've got no idea how to treat a woman.' I push past him to the door but he plants his now enormous frame and blocks me.
'You're going nowhere. I’ve told them to keep her, get a social worker or whatever - she's not coming back here - I've had just about enough of her.'
As long as he stood there I couldn't move but I felt something snap - I was melting, like those chocolates with alcohol in the middle; the heat spread around my heart and I smiled.
'Ok,' I said. 'We'll wait and see what happens next.' I move to the kettle and fill it, switch it on and make all the normal movements of making tea. He lets his shoulders down and moves into the living room. His chair leaned right into the path to the front door. It all helps me automatically reach under the sink for the poison I'd got for mice last year.