Bernard Tismaniac goes berserk

This is about a Goodmayes Lodge resident called Bernard Tismaniac who becomes violent and kick's his own home up in the sky, causing it to fly all the way down Longbridge Road, before crashing right down into Lidl from the sky.

One night Bernard Tismaniac went off his rocker and banged the front door of his flat, then raced out into the corridor, kicking walls and urinating on every flat door.

One of the support workers, who was 12 foot tall caught him and shouted:

 

"If you don't shut up mad boy I'll get the police to take you away to Goodmayes Hospital."

 

The man became violent and shouted f---off at the carer on duty. She responded by grabbing hold of him and chucking him up to the ceiling, where he ended up hanging onto a smoke alarm.

 

The man was so heavy that the smoke alarm couldn't support him and he ended up ripping it off the ceiling. He than went off his rocker and tried to eat the smoke alarm.

 

The carer Miss Stake shouted at him:

 

"Will you please take that thing out of your mouth Bernie Tismadman, Tismaniac.

 

"Oh, shut up you big monster, shouted the mad resident, why don't you get thrown to the lions.

 

"Get back into the room Bernie Tismadman,troublemaker.

 

The man reacted violently, grabbed hold of the carer and knocked her flying.

She flew along the corridor and went,

 

"Smack!,

Right into the wall.

In fact, such was the force that she made a hole in the wall.

The woman in charge came out, flew in a mad rage towards the madman Bernie and chucked him down the stairs.

This made him madder than ever and rushed right out into the car park, banged the bins and jumped up on top of one of the cars and stamped on it, so violently that he made a hole in the roof. He then ran out into the street and ripped lamp posts out of the pavement, throwing them across the road.

He even dug the road up with his head and sucked a mains pipe beneath, sending out electric shocks which were so fierce that he got thrown up into the air and landed up on top of Parkside theatre.

 

 

Still in his fit of madness Bernard Tismaniac burst into Parkside and threw chairs out of the windows.

He then rushed across the road and went back into Goodmayes Lodge, when the carer shouted at him:

 

"Get out of this block Mad Boy I don't want you, you're just a big monster who should be locked up."

 

Bernie had to spend the night locked out in the car park after the fracas with the carer Miss Stake in Goodmayes Lodge.

 

Come Friday the next morning Miss Stake left to go home and when she saw Bernard Tisman she told him to hop it or get locked up in Goodmayes.

Then along came Daffy Dill, one of the other support workers and had to phone Bernard Tisman's cousin Alan Tortoise to get Bernie sectioned after the mad rampage the previous night and the violent confrontation with the sleep in carer Miss Stake.

 

When Daffy Dill came up to Bernard Tismaniac's flat she saw it in a right mess , with dinner plates smashed all over the place and excrement smeared all over the walls. And did it arf pong?

 

The flat was a right pig sty.

 

There were also doors that had been wrenched right off their hinges because Bernie Tismaniac had banged them so violently.

 

But that's not the end of the story because Bernard Tismaniac  is about to take revenge.

 

He rush's toward's Goodmayes Lodge and kick's it up into the sky, knocking it flying.

The block of flats then flies along Longbridge Road whilst it's up in the sky and:

 

"Whoosh!

 

"It crash's straight into Lidl completely flattening it.

 

Everybody who was in their flats at the time the block was knocked flying when a madman kicked it up into the sky are thrown about in their homes because of the extreme force.

Even the carers are thrown all over the place.

 

Now that Goodmayes Lodge has crashed into Lidl everything has been flattened.

 

People who were shopping at the time got  thrown to the floor when Goodmayes Lodge came crashing down into Lidl after it was knocked flying by Bernard Tismaniac when he kicked it up into the sky in a mad temper.

 

In fact there is so much damage that everything is rendered unsuitable to buy.

 

The sight of a block of flats crashing right down into the Lidl store after flying through the air took everybody by surprise.

 

In the end a crane is used to pull Goodmayes Lodge out of the wreckage of Lidl, then hoist's it up into the air, and into a helicopter.  The helicopter is then used to carry the block of flats along Longbridge Road, before returning it to the site from where it was wrenched out of the ground when a madman kicked it up into the sky.

 

However, the support home can't be re - inserted into the foundations from which it was ripped out from after a madman kicked it up into the sky, so the plan is to rehouse every tenant until a new Goodmayes Lodge is built on the site.

 

Meanwhile Bernard Tismaniac is caught by police and bundled into a car. They take him to Goodmayes Hospital and section him for 200 years.

The End

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